GIRLS WHO ARE WIZARDS

2024 is quite a year for Ms. Vylet! The music never stops, no! Released only months before Monarch of Monsters, Pony's ambitious first foray into true progressive rock music, Girls Who Are Wizards presented the world with an absolute EDM masterpiece.

1. "Girls Who Are Wizards" (5:58) What?! Really?! We're going to start like this: like the music for some Russian doll's skating party. And then the DJ jumps in and ramps things up--to levels I never expected! Wow! She wants us to dance! The strobe lights make it impossible to distinguish ghosts from people, animals from fantasy beings. And then Vy moves us yet again (already!) into new and different sensory experiences as she eventually smooths it out for vocals, humanoid, and voices, android/robotic/faerie. "The music never stops, NO!" she lets us know. The dance music to follow is more sedate and straightforward (the calm before the storm) but then Vy unleashes a barrage of absolute banger dance themes, here allowing the humans on the dance floor to remain coordinated and rhythmic (as opposed to robotic and syncopated). (9.5/10)

2. "The Story of DJ Goober" (3:48) to me this is the central theme to this whole album, and perhaps to Zelda Trixie Lulamoon's entire life: "The music never stops, No!" It's definitely the overwhelming favorite chant or slogan that the fan base has latched onto when discussing this album. (9.5/10)

3. "The Queen Is Back" (3:47) an absolutely awesome squeaky-snarky OZRIC TENTACLES-like dubstep palette that serves as a set up for a killer rap. How can such a beautiful voice produce such a scary rap? And the samples dropped seamlessly into the mix are out-of-this-world perfect! Amazing! Such a cool song! (10/10)

4. "The Wizard of Wubz (Wub Anthem)" (3:38) more amazingly-quilted dub stop! No! The music never stops! You go girl! I'm just in awe watching from the sidelines! (And exhausted for the ride you've taken me on!) (9.375/10)

5. "There's a Menu Theme Nestled Within Us All" (3:32) the first seam in the album flow finds us in a resting pool between waterfalls and class five rapids. But then things pick up: the raft is flowing again--moving down the stream into the bigger, faster river, heightening our vigilance so that we're ready for and aware of the possible obstacles ahead. But it's safe! The river widens, we lie back and bask in the high midday summer sun! This is heaven! It's like taking a trip back to the techno R&B hits of the mid 1980s--the songs that the Black-music oriented stations used to play (Janet, Stephanie Mills, Cherelle, Karen White, Rene & Angela, Deniece Williams, Teena Marie, etc.). And it's all so effortless! Thank you, Pony, for being such a master adventure planner! (9.125/10)

6. "Musicians of Ponyville (Horse Friends Pt. 3: Return of the Dreaded Vy Scratch?)" (4:35) opening with some electric piano riffs from the lexicon of Western Classical music, Pony expertly works them into a nice off-road dirt-bike ride that soon turns down some rather treacherous hill and woodland trails. The open air scenes are again themed by a return to those classical riffs (in their EDM dubstep forms, of course). The insertion and placement of EDM noises, shifts, and sampled voice and oddities is nothing less than a display of absolute genius! And it all SOUNDS SO GOOD! Adrenaline junkies beware (or be aware) of this song! (9.125/10)

7. "Reflected in the Eyes of the Cavern Lurker" (4:25) okay, the bike trail ends at the beach, at Pacific Coast dusk and sunset. The view is almost astral as time and events slow down to a nanocrawl, the creatures and beings of subspace flowing in and out of our awareness, moving like spectres in a YES song. "High vibration go on, to the Sun, oh let my heart, Dreaming! Past a mortal as me. Where can I be?" Brilliant and, for me, very nostalgic. (Could you tell?) (10/10)

8. "Creature City" (4:27) a kind of jazzy electronica song that reminds me of something that could've come off of a BUGGLES album . . . in 2010. Or one of Rebecca Sugar's cartoon tracks . . . if only she were a better music maker. The cartoon voice lead vocal is a bit out of my taste palette--as is the stop-and-wait Saturday morning simplified music, but it's still a display of genius and ubertalent. (8.875/10)

9. "Potion Seller" (5:41) oh! moving to the funk-R&B side of the EDM electronic dubstep world. The music does not stop! With the female vocals it even works like something from one of the hit-wonder divas of the top of the charts like Janet Jackson, Beyonce Knowles, or Christina Agulera--at least until the dubstep instrumental takes over, then it becomes the property of some DJ for a dance remix. Not my favorite but by no means poor or much of a let down: this artist is so impressive! (9/10)

10. "Sacred Dragon" (5:30) stepping down to lo-fi for the vocal-serving EDM music here, Pony sings about the power inside that is making her stronger and stronger. The music is quite a bit smoother and more radio- and pop-friendly here--at least until the third minute when the instrumental section takes over. The innocent/ethereal/breathy vocals distract and deceive us a little from the power message. (8.875/10)

11. "Battle! Against the Banished Sorcerer Knight, Stinklebug" (3:40) jumping now into some more serious testosterone; is MLP world in danger of being tsunamied? So, who is performing in this battle? The DJ seems to have everything under her control: listening to all of the offensive epithets being thrown its way but then deflecting and cleansing the dance floor palette with some badass waves and grooves of its own. Awesome! (9.5/10)

12. "Facing Oblivion to Become the Lode Star" (7:00) some variations on and recapitulations of previous themes--both musically and lyrically (The music never stops!), Vylet seems to be tying up loose ends, mending broken ties, winding down toward an end. Even the lyrics of this song seem to be retrospective and wistfully reflective, while the music is slightly more subdued, linear and controlled. I don't know if Vy's done this intentionally or even knowingly but even if it's all intuition, it's sheer genius. (14.25/15)

13. "In the Name of Friendship" (6:43) the sun comes shining through after the cold night of stars and mystical adventures. Beautiful finish to an absolutely stunning album. (9.25/10)

Total Time 62:44

It is SO GOOD to hear Vylet Pony return to the dub-step EDM palette that she explored earlier in her career with such impact and success. Her range is so much broader and her sound and track selections so original and unique--and yet still embedded in her own voice, her own earworm chord progressions--it's just a wonder to observe (this unfolding of higher and higher levels of mastery). It is OBVIOUS that, for Ms. Zelda Trixie Lulamoon, the music never stopped: it's all been inside her, festering, stewing, taking its time to emerge as yet another James Beard Award winning recipe! And each side dish arrives with seamless timing and perfect palette flow for my taste buds! I am in the stupor of a gourmand's post-meal coma! And I LOVE the new-found DEEP wellspring of power (and self-love) DJ Luigi has found! The incredible talent I've felt in this artist is finally being tapped to its fullest potential! Yeah! Long live the Pony!

A/five stars; a true masterpiece of incredible music. Call it prog if you can, if you will, (I wish you would!), regardless of its categories, this is one amazing album, from perfect start to perfect finish and everything in between. As much as I love and respect Vy for aiming "high" for success and notoriety in Prog World (i.e. with Monarch of Monsters), I really think her talents and skills lend itself to something bigger and more modern than that old Dinosaur World; in the world of EDM and dubstep and whatever else this is (supposed to be), Vylet Pony reigns as a god(dess)! Which is to say, I like this album MUCH more than her 2024 alternative (Monarch of Monsters). In fact, this is definitely one of my five favorite albums of 2024--right up there with Terrapath, Twenty Pills Without Water, Cold Waves Divide Us, and Tarot Part I. Based upon ratings and metrics alone (the Fishscales) this would be my runaway Album of the Year and the ONLY album to earn true masterpiece status from the 2024 releases I've heard.