Hair swirling bands DO NOT belong in PA

Look, I'm going to put my foot down here. I'm passionate about the integrity of the Prog Archives, and I believe the following line should be drawn:

Any band whose members line up and then in unison lower their heads and swirl their hair should not be in the archives. I'm not sure if any currently are, but if so, we need to get them out. If not, then, we need to make it clear that hair swirling is not cool, not proggy, and frankly looks stupid.

Thoughts anyone?

cobb wrote: Huh, discrimination on the grounds of hair length went out in about 1978 or something...

Oh, Cobb on! Surely you don't think I'm discriminating based solely on lenght of hair? I certainly hope that isn't the conclusion you've drawn (God, say it isn't so!)

No, I'm talking about rock "musicians" who line up center-stage, lower their head and swirl it in unison. That, my friend, is the problem. Not the length of the hair, because I am a huge fan of Zep, Yes, and all bands far and wide, but the lining up and swirling...I defy anyone to defend the practice, or extol its coolness, or hipness or whatever...

That, my down-under comrade, is what I'm talking about. If you think it's discriminatory, please explain yourself. In the meantime, I'll presume I've made my case.

Hair swirling, I need to know if others think its cool...

Gentle Ronnie wrote: What are you, nazi?

No, I'm not a nazi, whatever the hell that means...

All I'm saying is I think that real prog, the prog that belongs on this website, should not condone or associate itself with the sort of embarrasing juvenalia that is in-unison hair-swirling.

Now, if the occaisional member swirls their hair, sort of in an impromptu way, because they're getting into the music or their solo, fine. I'm talking about all the musicians lining up, lowering their heads and swirling their hair -- especially if they all swirl it in the same direction!

I'm trying to protect the integrity of the archives, really, in an ethical, morally-enlightened, unbigoted sort of way. But bands without taste...no, I'm sorry.

I'm just bringing it up because this whole prog metal thing is getting too uncomfortably close to in-unison hair-swirling, and I'm getting a little frightened...   

Easy Livin wrote: So are you saying Status Quo are not prog then?

Do they in-unison hair swirl?

Logos wrote: The jokes on this site are getting more and more complicated!

Who's joking? I'm utterly serious...

Logos wrote: Uh-oh.. okay then...

Does this request of mine seem wrong-headed to you? Please explain.

Dear bluetailfly,

considering all the efforts musicians make to grow long hair, to take care of it, to wash it and dry up, I think it would be silly not to use the opportunity to swirl your beautiful long hair.

Did you know that people grow long hair on purpose to swirl it around in unison? Well, it is true, but most find it awkward to admit.

Gentle Ronnie wrote: Dear bluetailfly, considering all the efforts musicians make to grow long hair, to take care of it, to wash it and dry up, I think it would be silly not to use the opportunity to swirl your beautiful long hair. Did you know that people grow long hair on purpose to swirl it around in unison? Well, it is true, but most find it awkward to admit.

No, I did not know that, and if you're serious, then I am deeply disturbed because I had no idea the hair-swirling subculture had reached to such a weirdly developed state.

I myself have had long hair and never once did I wish my other long-haired buddies would stand next to me so that we could swirl our hair together. I mean, it makes them look like some surreal form of the Osmond Brothers or some other packaged music commodity. It's like they're so focused on hair and hair products and that they can't see that what they're doing is acutely embarrasing to their fans.

Prog rock will not tolerate this tasteless form of rock commodification. If Steve Howe comes center stage with Squire and Anderson and they start hair-swirling in a serious way, I'm moving to like Nambia or something to become a monk.

AtLossForWords wrote: I think windmill headbanging looks really cool on stage.  No, it's not very prog, but doesn't mean a band would not be prog by doing so.

"Windmill headbanging" ? Is that that the correct term? Is that when they do it in unison?

As for windmill headbanging not being a criteria for being a prog band, I'd have to say, I'm afraid it should be. I mean, look, if Yes had played the exact same music but at every show Jon Anderson bit the heads off chickens or some other freak act, I don't think they'd be categorized as prog, even though the music is the same.

Same thing here. Some cringingly embarassing digressions of showmanship permanently mark a band.

You want to windmill headbang, fine, but I for one (and it's only my opinion) don't think they belong in the archives, which is an institution I care deeply about and I worry about it's becoming a diluted laughing stock of what the founding fathers/mothers intended.

Thank you.