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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 00:29

Wash it better than it washes itself.

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 00:30
My fireplace told me that hell is real and full of artisan cheeses.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 00:38
^ It might've said "artisan Jesus".

"Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought."   -- John F. Kennedy
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 01:41
Originally posted by Atavachron Atavachron wrote:

^ It might've said "artisan Jesus".



Well I know where the artisan Jesus is so that would just be redundancy.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 01:42
Strength is generally evaluated on a geologic scale.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 01:43
Stars charge and I'll be your pork.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 01:46
Sell what you can and breathe through the hourglass.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 06:53
There's a disgusting lack of coherency and I have traded shifts.
@ProgFollower on Twitter. Tweet me muzak.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 08:25
He just took eternity leave. I told him that was the wrong form.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 08:32
My eyes always tear up when they exchange bowels.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 08:54
My concepts need more garlic and oregano. I get my oregano straight from Oregon.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 10:06
Your belly button reminds me to hold a candle in my mouth.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 10:07
Gum diction.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 13:54
Original titles to famous novels #26: Are You There Mr. Tetherbottom? It's Me Margret
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 19:00
I can't stop sticking my mouth in my mouth.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 19:32
Law & Hors d'oeurves
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 19:34
If you cannot prevail, then postvail.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 19:50
I'm dying for a postlude.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 19:50

I slipped out of the shower into a dimension with many penises.

Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2016 at 21:17
I want nothing to do with fog machines.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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