.

 

After all, it's not the Engs it's the Englas, with the actual name originally being "Engla-land" (not "Enga-land" as some no-neck football hooligans would be prone to chant). Engla is of course related to Anglais, or Crème Anglais - a crème pâtissière or confectioner's custard whose name comes from the latin Angulus, meaning "a corner" because the pâtissière that invented this custard was usually situated on the corner of the main street. The Gauls (original inhabitants of the land now known as France and not the Franks, who were in fact German, nor the Normans, who also came from Germany, along with the original Angles who came from Jutland - however the mighty Saxon came from Barnsley) added their word for "ground", (which for those not paying attention, is "terre" named after the apples that grow in "the ground" [or "potato" as it is properly pronounced]), making "Angle-terre" as their name for the island of peoples who like to sit in "a corner" while partaking of their favourite pastimes of eating cream custard, (in the form of custard cream bisquits), fishing and measuring the circular displacement of two lines sharing a common vertex, from where we get the two modern words of "Angling" and "Angles" [it should be noted that the famous book by Izzak Walton entitled "The Compleat Angler" is a total misnomer and has nothing what so ever to do with trigonometry, at least none that I could find and I skimmed it twice, in both directions, unless he was refering to the angle subtended by the fishing-line and the surface of the lake/pond]. One interesting fact regarding the Englas is three of them together make a triangle, (whose sides are traditionally labelled "E", "L" and "P" accordingly), which any Prog music aficionado will know is a vital piece of equipment in a modern percussionists arsenal of percussion instruments, and thus the Engla-ish invented the modern symphony orchestra from it's humble beginnings as a bell-like instrument made from a piece of chromium plated brass tube bent into the shape of an isosceles triangle and used by Mike Oldfield for his seminal album and several less than seminal ones - of course a brass tube without the unnecessary bending forms another vital part of the modern symphony orchestra in the form of the cor anglais (etymologically the "cor" is derived from the apple in "pomme de terre" making the whole derivation circular and self-referential). It's worth noting at this point that Isosceles was a famous Roman general who invaded Bretagne (now modern Britney) somewhere between 1CE and teatime, famous of course for having a head shaped like a square-based pyramid. It should also be noted that Bretagne (now modern Britney ~ famed for the manufacture of lances and javelins) was once known as Little Britain while Engla-land (and it's associated kingdoms) were known as Grande-Bretagne. Over time Engla-land became shortened by removing the superfluous "la" (french for "the", but the soft girlie "the" ... also a note to follow "so") - musicologically this is incorrect - to create the correct cadence the "eng" should have been replaced by "so", however the resulting "So-la-land" would have been an oxymoron given the annual number of sunny days annually experienced on the island each year. Transposing the lead note a whole tone (or two semi-tones if you prefer) gives a more accurate and descriptive solution, leaving us with "La-la-land".

 

I rest my case.