Reviews reporting thread

Heart of the Matter wrote: Why do we have to be reduced to the condition of mindless haters? Invectives (like the T word) suddenly thrown from a page that is supposed to be safe in that sense, for readers and artists equally, diminish us all by taking respect away from here: https://www.progarchives.com/Review.asp?id=3145383

If you look at Papapork’s review/rating history they have never actually reviewed or rated anything they like. 2 stars is the most they’ve ever given. What’s the point? Does this person even like music?!?

And a turd by any other name would smell as sweet.

While PapaPork writes questionable reviews, pooh-poohs albums left and right, and might not last much longer, with that specific piece on Kayak, I am not comfortable deleting it. Not good at all, silly, but could be worse. And I must admit that I like to bandy around the word turd, but I try not to at dinner parties. Never really thought of it as a band word to be protected from. I have had an interest in coprolites which basically are fossilised turds and had wanted to make a movie on that topic (think Relic Hunter meets Jurassic Park, only crappier) but I digress. One of my favourite negative reviews of an album I love comes from well-respected person here and also used the turd word. Easy Livin starts his Soft Machine Third review published in 2004 by calling it "Turds". And he's one of the guys who worked on the rules for this site.

Yeah, must be unfair if Paul rates it highly. Almost as unfair as rating something highly that Paul rates lowly or gives one of these to: I don't take your comment that seriously by the way.

Edited by Logan - January 15 2025 at 11:26

^ Stinker, now that term super-annoys me. It need a trigger-warning with it. Some past trauma involving smug people uttering it. :) I much prefer the term turd to stinker; "steaming coil" has its place, as do all words given the right context.

Splish is a favourite of mine for things I think cool but I seem to be the only one who uses it. I think I heard it used once in a Nike commercial when I was in Australia in 1989/1990. "These shoes are so splish!" I think Nike was looking for a word to catch on, well it least it did with me!

PS. I hope hope people get I was kidding around with the Paul comment. I take no offence if people dislike music I like or like music I don't like. I'm not some arbiter of good and bad taste. To each their own likes. Okay, it does sometimes annoy when people come across as too easily dismissive of music and don't back up their disdain with reasoning or seem to lack empathy and interest when it comes to not taking how others feel or by not taking recommendations and differing ideas into serious consideration or exploration.

Edited by Logan - January 15 2025 at 12:14

^ Unfortunately the project has been canned. Put in the can, literally. Mr. Muckle, my anthro-poo-ology/ archaeology instructor liked the script (I wrote it in response to learning about coprolites in class). Very Raiders of the Lost Ark; but still more more Raiders of the Lost Stool. I have it on a floppy disk somewhere that vaguely resembles a cow paddy (once fossilised, the loose paddy gets very firm indeed). I also had hoped to do one with Steve Irwin called Coprolite Hunter, "Crikey, see how that coprolite is all coiled up? It's in its defensive position... Do not try this at home!" By the way, I got to handle coprolites, they didn't smell. They say you can't polish a turd, but you can polish a fossilised turd. Incidentally, I have heard stinker used in that sense more than once. I was that child, and truth be told, I still am.

progaardvark wrote: I often have to describe the dog's bowel movements to my wife. She likes to keep track of this in case we need to change his diet, as diarrhea is neither fun for the dog nor me who has to pick it up.

I wish I had a dollar for every dog turd I've picked up in my lifetime lol! I had six dogs in all, with four of them living well into their mid-teens. Each of them would sh*t at least two or three times a day, and one of them was quite a big dog, so that's a lot of excrement to dispose of! Thankfully none of them were very often troubled by diarrhoea.

Edited by yam yam - January 15 2025 at 18:00

Well this thread took a turn

Gotta say Papa Pork outdid himself with the Kayak review.  Just "Think of Supertramp's worst album. Then have a bunch of teenagers from our CURRENT year try to do something like it." alone is worth keeping the review around.  

woundedpig wrote: The Papa Pork "reviewer" continues to soil the pages of Progarchives. So obviously a troll. Rather than say that readers should just pass on by, these banal screeds should go into the dustbin and the writer banned from the site.

To tell you the truth, I'd take PapaPork's trolling over ProgressiveHeart's AI generated fake reviews any day.

woundedpig wrote: The Papa Pork "reviewer" continues to soil the pages of Progarchives. So obviously a troll. Rather than say that readers should just pass on by, these banal screeds should go into the dustbin and the writer banned from the site.

Now this is good writing... wasn't Banal Screeds a punk rocker from the early '80s ?