WOMEN

Geck0 wrote: The girl/man of your dreams may just like archeology, theology, photography, or whatever, it just may not appear obvious.

heyitsthatguy wrote: Right now, I'm in a situation where I can't talk to girls because none of them are my friends (and I doubt they want to be), and if I like someone, that means talking to them automatically makes them suspicious.....

Suspicious of what?  That you want to get laid?  Girls know that already!  Stop outthinkin' yourself!  Besides, girls want it too, they're just not as open about it.

Something that might help is a book called Your Erroneous Zones by Wayne Dyer.  You can look it up on Amazon.  This is not typical self-help pap but practical stuff you can employ from the get-go.  I read this book and it helped me a lot.

A quote from the book's description:  "If you spend more time worrying what others think than working on what you want and need, Dyer points the way to true self-reliance."

    I am 17 and I still virging, but I dont care so much...

moonlapse wrote: heyitsthatguy wrote: Right now, I'm in a situation where I can't talk to girls because none of them are my friends (and I doubt they want to be), and if I like someone, that means talking to them automatically makes them suspicious..... Suspicious of what?  That you want to get laid?  Girls know that already!  Stop outthinkin' yourself!  Besides, girls want it too, they're just not as open about it. Something that might help is a book called Your Erroneous Zones by Wayne Dyer.  You can look it up on Amazon.  This is not typical self-help pap but practical stuff you can employ from the get-go.  I read this book and it helped me a lot. A quote from the book's description:  "If you spend more time worrying what others think than working on what you want and need, Dyer points the way to true self-reliance."

First, may a clarify that I don't want to "get laid"...I actually don't want sex at all. I meant that they're suspicious of me liking them, and that in and of itself is reason enough for them to avoid me...its like having me like them is a chore or curse or something

heyitsthatguy wrote: JJLehto wrote: OK hoes this for a crazy situation:   There's a girl at my shcool that I have feelings for....but somehow..........I told her I have a girlfriend.     So..while its really not my style I have the feeling im gunna lie outta this one. Or tell her aI made up the fact I have a girlfriend........will you go out with me?   I really dont think so first of all, why the HELL would you tell her that in the first place??

heyitsthatguy wrote: Jimbo wrote: Geck0 wrote: I was very surprised this weekend with my female friend who I don't normally have much to talk to about, because we started chatting about politics and it turns out she's quite clued-up on it, that was a pleasant surprise! A word to all: don't under-estimate girls (and girls, don't under-estimate men), because sometimes they can surprise you with a conversation.  You won't know until something is brought up. The girl/man of your dreams may just like archeology, theology, photography, or whatever, it just may not appear obvious. So try all avenues of conversation. Indeed, I think this is a very good point. Of course, it's not very likely that the girl you end up talking to is a huge fan of all things prog etc. but it does happen occasionally. For example, there's this girl at my school who pretty much looks like the next Paris Hilton. For some reason, I ended up discussing things with her, and it turned out she's a huge jazz fan, plays saxophone, and is generally interested in the same things as I am. I'm hardly the one to give advice on this subject, but the point is, you should never trust appearances. Even if some girls may seem shallow, you need to look beyond the surface to find out what's really going on. This can't be done, if you don't talk to them at all. Oh, then I'm f**ked Right now, I'm in a situation where I can't talk to girls because none of them are my friends (and I doubt they want to be), and if I like someone, that means talking to them automatically makes them suspicious.....

The Wizard wrote: heyitsthatguy wrote: Jimbo wrote: Geck0 wrote: I was very surprised this weekend with my female friend who I don't normally have much to talk to about, because we started chatting about politics and it turns out she's quite clued-up on it, that was a pleasant surprise! A word to all: don't under-estimate girls (and girls, don't under-estimate men), because sometimes they can surprise you with a conversation.  You won't know until something is brought up. The girl/man of your dreams may just like archeology, theology, photography, or whatever, it just may not appear obvious. So try all avenues of conversation. Indeed, I think this is a very good point. Of course, it's not very likely that the girl you end up talking to is a huge fan of all things prog etc. but it does happen occasionally. For example, there's this girl at my school who pretty much looks like the next Paris Hilton. For some reason, I ended up discussing things with her, and it turned out she's a huge jazz fan, plays saxophone, and is generally interested in the same things as I am. I'm hardly the one to give advice on this subject, but the point is, you should never trust appearances. Even if some girls may seem shallow, you need to look beyond the surface to find out what's really going on. This can't be done, if you don't talk to them at all. Oh, then I'm f**ked Right now, I'm in a situation where I can't talk to girls because none of them are my friends (and I doubt they want to be), and if I like someone, that means talking to them automatically makes them suspicious.....   Is there some sort of law that says you can't talk to people who aren't friends? Make friends.   Also, your paranoid. Your use of the word suspicous is kinda odd.

Odd? Paranoid? How do you know I just said that?! STOP WATCHING ME!!

Well, this may stem from something that happened to me before....

The last (and I think only) girl I liked, I finally, after 3 YEARS of debating in my head, fighting back and forth, I gain enough courage to ask her out. And she says yes! I'm happy!......
....for about a day and a half, then for the next month, she doesn't talk to me, and, in addition, seems annoyed at me making attempts to communicate with her. Finally, one night in February, I ask her about our plans for our supposed "first date" and what not, and she said that a) she lied, b) she never had any feelings for me of any kind whatsoever, and c) that I should STOP STALKING HER. Yes, apparently trying to talk somone who's supposedly your GIRLFRIEND (but it was all a lie) is considered STALKING. All this thru AIM to make things worse. Granted, I don't think I should've made the "that's not what camera 3 says you're doing right now " joke right after she said that, but I wasn't aware that she was serious.

So, I probably should be above this, especially since I know where it stemmed from, but it doesn't make the fear of being hated and rejected any less real to me.

PaperDuck wrote: SolariS - Well, if you really want to, the place to start would be to knock off my bf Seriously though, that was part of my point, albeit an between-the-lines one. There are no available girls in physics. So look beyond physics! Check out the other sciences, the social sciences (esp. linguistics - a lot of these are math people who were alienated by math classes), and even the humanities. My aforementioned boyfriend is a creative writing major, a type I would normally shun - but he introduced me to prog rock, has a sharp analytic mind and shares my passion for Stargate and Star Trek. He just likes writing. Actually, thatguy has a point. If a geek out of the blue comes up and talks to a girl in high school, she will more likely than not move him from her "nerd" estimation to her "creep" estimation. Try talking to them about classwork, and work up from there. I also think moonlapse is right. Most of you high school guys seem to be focusing on the unattainable women - who, in the end, you would wish you hadn't "attained" . The geek-girls may not be as glamorous, but they'll have more in common with you and will probably be easier to get to know and to "attain". You just have to look a little harder to find them - not because they aren't there, but because they aren't wearing underwear on the outside.

Yes, this is a long post, bear w/ me

That's the thing.....I've never liked a single girl for their looks in my life. My sister (back when I liked that one aforementioned girl) frequently made fun of me for liking her and her being "not attractive", but I was more attracted to her intellect and general kindness (which the latter I now see as a self righteous front ha-haa)


Edited by heyitsthatguy - September 17 2006 at 18:09

proger wrote:     I am 17 and I still virging, but I dont care so much...

Welcome in the club!

There are worse things than being a virgin. Like being 17 and not having a girlfriend...

No, let us be serious. Of course I sometimes have the itch to have a girlfriend, but on the other hand I think I'll find a nice girl some day. What is important to me when looking for a girlfriend is the fact that she is not superficial. She should be intelligent and she should not have such an uptied sense of humor I regrettably often observed by girls. And of course she should be pretty.

And she should like prog, especially Gentle Giant, look like Carmen Electra, play the E-Guitar and like fantasy.

PaperDuck wrote: SolariS wrote: PaperDuck wrote: SolariS - Well, if you really want to, the place to start would be to knock off my bf Seriously though, that was part of my point, albeit an between-the-lines one. There are no available girls in physics. So look beyond physics! Check out the other sciences, the social sciences (esp. linguistics - a lot of these are math people who were alienated by math classes), and even the humanities. My aforementioned boyfriend is a creative writing major, a type I would normally shun - but he introduced me to prog rock, has a sharp analytic mind and shares my passion for Stargate and Star Trek. He just likes writing. Actually, thatguy has a point. If a geek out of the blue comes up and talks to a girl in high school, she will more likely than not move him from her "nerd" estimation to her "creep" estimation. Try talking to them about classwork, and work up from there. I also think moonlapse is right. Most of you high school guys seem to be focusing on the unattainable women - who, in the end, you would wish you hadn't "attained" . The geek-girls may not be as glamorous, but they'll have more in common with you and will probably be easier to get to know and to "attain". You just have to look a little harder to find them - not because they aren't there, but because they aren't wearing underwear on the outside. Well, you assume that I actually interact with girls from other areas of science and art. This is my biggest problem. All of the buildings on campus are segregated by subject. I work in a lab in the basement of the physics building. Not only do I NOT see all of the people who come through the physics building, but I also work with the 5 people in my lab. Granted, I know other people in physics, but outside of the people that regularly work in the building, I have no chance of meeting anyone else. I don't go to class, except for the 1 physics class I have...and believe me, NOBODY wants to take a graduate physics class except for people who are graduates in physics.See what I mean? I have no chance of meeting anyone on campus...and I don't really think that lurking around the chemistry building and putting out the vibe is a reasonable option.To complicate matters further, I attend a tech school where 78% of the 18,000 students in attendance are dudes. Ooh, yeah, that could be a problem... With such a bad ratio, maybe you should look outside of school?

I'm trying, but I don't have anywhere to look.

I guess I'm just doomed to a lonely life of physics and prog. That's ok, sweet baby prog is always faithful.





Edited by SolariS - September 17 2006 at 20:32

I'm 14 in 8th grade...