WITH TEARS FROM JENNIFER
Printed From: Progarchives.com
Category: Topics not related to music
Forum Name: Just for Fun
Forum Description: Participate in trivia and knowledge games, share jokes, etc.
URL: http://www.progarchives.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=55407
Printed Date: December 15 2024 at 02:37
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 11.01 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: WITH TEARS FROM JENNIFER
Posted By: The Whistler
Subject: WITH TEARS FROM JENNIFER
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 04:22
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And thus was the email that was depositted in my spam folder earlier last week (?). What I don't get is how Jenny Jenny there was "by instinct...convinced [I am] an honest man." Hell, how did she know I was a man? And where did she get this "honesty" bullcrap from? Someone needs to fire my PR guy... So...how much should I wire her? ------------- "There seem to be quite a large percentage of young American boys out there tonight. A long way from home, eh? Well so are we... Gotta stick together." -I. Anderson |
WITH TEARS FROM JENNIFERReplies:
Posted By: fil karada
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 04:42
I love those emails lol. I also was contacted to help some rich diamond guy 
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Some people find joy in knowledge. Some people find joy in ignorance. Some people just enjoy music. |
Posted By: el dingo
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 05:13
Didn't realise God was indeed female (her loving arms, etc) but I know how she knew you were male... she must've checked out your member profile on PA!
I suggest you wire her up to an appropriately-powered chair and plug it in  ------------- It's not that I can't find worth in anything, it's just that I can't find worth in enough. |
Posted By: chopper
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 06:29
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50%chance of getting it right! No, this is in no way a con, send her the money. And while you're at it, could you send me some as well.  |
Posted By: Slartibartfast
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 07:41
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I'm kind of partial to the vague spam like this: [email protected] Your shlong'll be your trump Hold all the aces in love http://bdf11a4qcgdtfv.spaces.live.com/  1000% grade A quality spam. Just picked the first spam I saw in my inbox. |
Posted By: Raff
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 07:45
I get those all the time too... It's just a pity that I have no shlong  !
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Posted By: zappaholic
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 07:45
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I see the Nigerian scammers have changed their home base.
------------- "Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard." -- H.L. Mencken |
Posted By: Slartibartfast
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 07:48
Actually you do, it's just petite. Keep an eye on your spam because sooner or later you'll be offered a way to make it bigger. By the way: Gold Buyback [[email protected]] MC Hammer and Ed McMahon are melting gold! Ed wants to buy your gold back! Oh, here's another good one: [email protected] Make your hose greater Only huge boners can reach g-spot http://6njocna42n58tv5tbf78fu.spaces.live.com/ This is going to get censored isn't it?  Interesting what the autobleeper doesn't pick up on... OK might as well go for the gold: Playboy [[email protected] Free Heart-Shaped Asses Gallery for Valentine's Day
Or how about this? Forensics Training ["=?iso-8859-1?B?Rm9yZW5zaWNzVHJhaW5pbmc=?="@battleism.com] Online Forensics Degrees http://bucket.battleism.com/42685C37yckl9368417978680Ww82rslF1413i87jaAxb101jsZ - Get a Forensics degree for a rewarding future This email contains an advertisement. You're probably gonna need forensics after they mess up your schlong... Customer: Morning, Waitress: Morning. Customer: What have you got? Waitress: Well, there's egg and bacon, egg sausage and bacon Egg and spam Egg, bacon and spam Egg, bacon, sausage and spam Spam, bacon, sausage and spam Spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam Spam, sausage, spam, spam, spam, bacon, spam tomato and spam Spam, spam, spam, egg and spam Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam. (Choir: Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Lovely Spam! Lovely Spam!) Or Lobster Thermidor aux crevettes with a mornay sauce served in a provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with truffle pate, brandy and a fried egg on top and spam. Wife: Have you got anything without spam? Waitress: Well, the spam, eggs, sausage and spam That's not got much spam in it Wife: I don't want any spam! Customer: Why can't she have eggs, bacon, spam and sausage? Wife: That's got spam in it! Customer: Hasn't got much spam in it as spam, eggs, sausage and spam has it? (Choir: Spam! Spam! Spam!...) Wife: Could you do me eggs, bacon, spam and sausage without the spam, then? Waitress: Iiiiiiiiiiiich!! Wife: What do you mean 'Iiiiiiiiiich'? I don't like spam! (Choir: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!) Waitress (to choir): Shut up! (Choir: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!) Waitress: Shut Up! Bloody Vikings! You can't have egg, bacon, spam and sausage without the spam. Wife: I don't like spam! Customer: Shush dear, don't have a fuss. I'll have your spam. I love it, I'm having spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam, and spam! (Choir: Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!) Waitress: Shut Up!! Baked beans are off. Customer: Well, could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then? Waitress: You mean spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam and spam? Choir (intervening): Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam. Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Spam spam spam spam! ------------- Released date are often when it it impacted you but recorded dates are when it really happened... 
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Posted By: Vompatti
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 08:34
Oh, come on! A heart looks nothing like that!  (Ass is to heart as boob is to liver?) |
Posted By: crimhead
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 12:35
Same here. I hate to see a woman cry. That just tears my heart all up. |
Posted By: el dingo
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 12:51
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To SLARTIBARTFAST (don't want to repeat all your post for obvious)
My local pub's got a Monty Python day on Feb 28. They're offering free Egg, Sausage, Spam Spam Spam and Spam to all Vikings. Guess I'd best not take the laptop. ------------- It's not that I can't find worth in anything, it's just that I can't find worth in enough. |
Posted By: Jozef
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 12:59
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Haha, I read about these scams. I always did wonder what they wrote. I always delete my spam mail so I can't recall ever receiving one of these.
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Posted By: June
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 13:58
Awesome, I'm so jealous I don't have a pub like that around here
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Posted By: el dingo
Date Posted: February 08 2009 at 14:17
It's the Railway Tavern Coltishall Norwich Norfolk UK - bit of a trek from Montreal I guess, but they've actually got a band on that night called Replica who do some pretty cool Zep/Sabbath/Marillion covers - and they're going to do The Spam Song AND The Philosophers' Song AND Always Look on the Bright Side.
If you make it I'll stand you a beer - I'll be one of many drunkards in the corner, but the only one with a SOAD T on ------------- It's not that I can't find worth in anything, it's just that I can't find worth in enough. |
Posted By: The Whistler
Date Posted: February 11 2009 at 02:58
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Oh no! No no no! Don't do that; I once got one that was for Viagra or gold watches or whatever, but the actual text of the email was so bizarrely disjointed that it was like beat poetry. I actually saved it on my olde computer...pity I forgot to move it. ------------- "There seem to be quite a large percentage of young American boys out there tonight. A long way from home, eh? Well so are we... Gotta stick together." -I. Anderson |