its..SPRING!!!...HERE IN AUSTRALIA!!!
AH SPRING!! WHERE A YOUNG MANS FANCY TURNS TO THOUGHTS OF THE VERY SAME THING HE HAS BEEN THINKING ABOUT FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR!!
AND NOT JUST YOUNG MEN!!!..MEN OF ALL AGES ARE PREOCCUPIED WITH THIS VERY SUBJECT,BUT SPRING SEEMS TO BRING IT TO THE FORE.
I SPEAK OF COURSE OF......... FOOD AND ALCOHOL!!!
WHAT!!!!..YOU THUOGHT I WAS TALKING ABOUT SEX???..WHAT A BUNCH OF...PERVERTS!!!!
ANYWAY.....SPRING IS A TIME OF RENEWAL WHERE LAMBS(GOOD GREIF HES GOING BACK TO THE LAMBS AGAIN!!) FROLIC IN THE FEILDS WATCHED BY EVER HUNGRY COYOTES WITH KNIVES AND FORKS AND UNLIMITED CREDIT AT THE ACME COMPANY(AS IS MY UNDERSTANDING OF THE ANIMAL KINGDOM GLAENED FROM ALL THOSE WARNER BROTHERS CARTOON DOCUMENTARIES WATCHED AS A CHILD!!!)
SPRING IS ALSO THE TIME WHEN BIRDS AND THE BEES CHASE EACH OTHER IN THE BIGGEST SEXUAL MISMATCH IN THE ANIMAL WORLD(AS IS ALSO MY UNDERSTANDING!!!....,FUNNY I DONT THINK I HAVE EVER SEEN A "BEED")
WOMENS CLOTHING LESSENS CONSIDERABLY AT THIS TIME OFTHE YEAR WHICH IS A NICE STATE OF AFFAIRS EXCEPT THE MALE CAR ACCIDENT RATE RISES BY ABOUT 4000 % FOR SOME STRANGE RAESON(ESPECIALLY REAR END ACCIDENTS) STILL THE LOCAL MECHANIC MUST BE RUBBING HIS HANDS AS THE WEATHER WARMS
UNFORTUNATLY SPRING LEADS INTO SUMMER
NOW,SUMMER CAN BE NICE BUT SUMMER HERE IN MY COUNTRY CAN LAST FOR MONTHS AND MONTHS AND MONTHS AND....ANYWAY YOU GET THE PICTURE
FOR WEEKS ON END EVERYTHING IS WRAPPED IN A HEATHAZE 'THE HORIZON SHIMMERS SO MUCH YOUD THINK YOU WERE HAVING AN ACID FLASHBACK!! IT GETS SO HOT YOU PRESS YOUR FACE AGAINST THE FLYWIRE SCREEN OF THE BEDROOM WINDOW(AS YOU DO OF COURSE!) PRAYING FOR A BREATH OF WIND AND THEN
it comes!!!!...UNFORTUNATELY IT IS FROM THE NORTH AND YOU LEAP BACK FROM THE WINDOW JUST INTIME TO SEE THE FLYWIRE GLOW A DULL CHERRY RED AS THE NEXT DOOR NIEGHBOURS GUM TREE BURSTS INTO FLAME AND THE WATER EVAPORATES FROM YOUR POOL!!!
YOU PLEED WITH THE GODS TO SEND A CLOUD TO COVER THE SUN..AND FINALLY IT COMES....EXCEPT THE HUMIDITY SUDDENLY RISES TO 150% AND YOU DROWN IN YOUR OWN SWEAT ALSO THE DOGS AND YOUR KIDS SWAET AS WELL AS THE NEXT DOORS SWEAT MIXED WITH THE ASH OF THE BURNT TREE
IT IS A GREAT TIME FOR ICE CREAMS AT LEAST IT WOULD BE IF THEY STAYED SOLID LONG ENOUGH TO EAT!!!
NOW IM DEPPRESING MYSELF!!
STILL THE BEACH IS NICE IN SUMMER
HERE IN ADELAIDE WE HAVE A BAECH CALLED "MASLINS" WHICH IS A NUDIST BEACH .YOU CAN TELL WHERE IT IS FROM THE LINES OF DIRTY OLD MEN WITH RAINCOATS AND BINOCULARS ON THE CLIFFS ABOVE....OF COARSE I HAVE NEVER BEEN THERE
WELL..I DID GO ONCE AS A TEENAGER WITH A BUNCH OF MATES BUT I THINK IT WAS PENSION DAY
AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON THE THUNDERSTORMS!!
SO HERES TOAUTUMN!! IT CANT COME QUICKLY ENOUGH!!!