Ask cuncuna...

tardis wrote: Cuncuna, where is the love? Where?? WHERE???

Love tends to end up covered by something else, because it is really small. Seach bellow any lady, with a bit of luck, you'll find it eventually...

Vompatti wrote: Apparently this thread has been forgotten, but I have a question that desperately yearns for an answer: How do I know if my hair is cut straight? The thing is, I cut it myself, and the only mirrors I own are attached to the wall so that if I look into them I only see my face, and when I turn around I don't see the mirror! I tried using a CD as a mirror (I placed it opposite to the mirror on the wall), but the image is kind of blurry and smallish. I also took several photographs of my back and the hair seems to be straight enough, but can I really be sure? What if it only seems straight in certain positions, but when I move my neck it reveals its true nature? Is there a way to know what my hair looks like? It feels kind of weird, as if there was less hair than there's supposed to be, but is it just because it's shorter? How can I leave my apartment without fear of putting myself into shame? How can I go on living? Is this the end? Is this really the end?

Vompatti wrote: Apparently this thread has been forgotten, but I have a question that desperately yearns for an answer: How do I know if my hair is cut straight? The thing is, I cut it myself, and the only mirrors I own are attached to the wall so that if I look into them I only see my face, and when I turn around I don't see the mirror! I tried using a CD as a mirror (I placed it opposite to the mirror on the wall), but the image is kind of blurry and smallish. I also took several photographs of my back and the hair seems to be straight enough, but can I really be sure? What if it only seems straight in certain positions, but when I move my neck it reveals its true nature? Is there a way to know what my hair looks like? It feels kind of weird, as if there was less hair than there's supposed to be, but is it just because it's shorter? How can I leave my apartment without fear of putting myself into shame? How can I go on living? Is this the end? Is this really the end?

You should take samples of it, send it to Christian Vander and wait for the punch line on this reply. Not the end yet, the pirate kissing the babe scene is not here yet. Meanwahile, go out and do something useful with your life, for example, you could donate hair to people with ugly breast implants, so they can add hair to them and make it really ugly. You could also donate blood and semen to the blood and semen foreign legion, but I'm affraid you'll have to break a few bridges for that. Remember to control masturbation globaly before your next haircut, and hope for a larger penis as we all do. Who knows? you might receive it in your birthday if you go to jail with that hair of yours, wich must be pretty and surely will get you some lovin if you let it grow and become an inmate of a proper institution.

But... I just did!.

Anyway. To say "I love you" to a girl. Use your voice and words to match your intentions. Bring some chocolate and be sure you know this girl and she knows you and also be really sure she is a girl; this days, that knowledge is elusive, but it's a hundreed gold bars worth. Look at her, explore how comfortable she is with you and just say it. Bring a video camera, a manager and an olympic referee; that girl is gonna be gold at the 400 mts competition, with or without  obstacles. Make sure tat she sings a contract with you first, then say "I love yuo" and then press "REC". Send the video to the olympic commitee of your area. Also buy some kleenex (for you), and eat the choclate to celebrate your bravery. Do not open te b ox of chocolate until after the dust cloud disappears, and warn the people from the next town about possible light speed collisions or spontaneous fire lines bursts on their roads. Use a helmet and protection in case she decides to run mindlessly, you could get hitted and die, and drink a lot of water, because water is good for you. Good luck.

Edited by cuncuna - January 31 2008 at 17:52

... I don't get it. Please explain; I'm not a native english speaker and subtext and intertextuality are sometimes out of reach because my lack of proper transcultural references.

Evans wrote: Alternatively, he could become a pick-up artist! :) But he probably won't need that, Vombatti is very very intelligent. Very very very ingelligent.

I bow before your mighty gifts of observation, for I truly am very very very very intelligent. That said, might I point out that my intention is not to "pick up" anyone, but merely share the inner depths of my soul with someone whom I consider to be my destiny (as Paul Anka sang, "You aaaare my deeeeeestinyyyy...") Or, to put it in another way, there's this cute girl I really like and I'd like her to know that I like her so that if she doesn't totally despise me I could maybe hold her hand sometimes (like the Beatles sang, "I wanna hold your haaaa-aaaa-aaaaaaand...") ride together toward the sunset like John Wayne and his loved one, or something like that. But, as Freddie Mercury sang, "Is this the reeeeeal life, is this just faaaantasyyyy?" or as Lou Reed sang "Whyyyyyy aaaaam I soooo shyyyyy? Anyway, I have to admit these things are way beyond my immense intelligence.

Shall I just grab one of those pigeons at the marketplace and hand it over to her? Doesn't seem very romantic to me, but maybe I'm too old-fashioned.

Oh, and how do I know if she's into me if she never looks at my crotch?

Edited by Vompatti - February 01 2008 at 18:43

I know where she lives, so I guess I'll just shove it through the mailbox and run. 

 might be an idea to check to see she doesn't suffer from peristerophobia first - could avoid a lot of unpleasant repercussions that way.

I actually think you might be able to pull it of without an animal, as long as you carefully avoid using words such as "peristerophobia" in front of her.