Inappropriate reviews |
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Trotsky
Special Collaborator Honorary Collaborator Joined: October 25 2004 Location: Malaysia Status: Offline Points: 2771 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 05:56 | ||
yes, if you change overrated to underrated and add in "sound" before quality, the review makes sense ... |
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"Death to Utopia! Death to faith! Death to love! Death to hope?" thunders the 20th century. "Surrender, you pathetic dreamer.”
"No" replies the unhumbled optimist "You are only the present." |
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator Honorary Collaborator Joined: March 23 2005 Location: Caerdydd Status: Offline Points: 32995 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 08:06 | ||
This i feel is just a tirade against ELP, which iis innacurate anyway, and not really a review. How do yoo feel about it Easy?
EMERSON LAKE & PALMER (ELP) Emerson, Lake and Palmer — I have always thought that Emerson Lake and Palmer were the most overrated prog band of all time. Their music is terrible. Especially Carl Palmer. The most overrated drummer ever, his meter is absolutely horrible. Every song sounds rushed. His kick foot is weak, uncoordinated and flimsy sounding. All ELP was ever trying to do was make Keith Emerson look like the Jimi Hendrix of the Hammond B-3. Which is all fine and good, but what makes prog good are the story lines and dynamics, which are totally absent in ELP's drivel. All ELP ever gives you is a bunch of sloppily played organ/synth instrumentals and then a couple wimpy, gutless Greg Lake troubador love ballads. And they actually did this for six albums. The hilarious thing is that these guys got away with this weak formula for as long as they did. After 1977 even their most die hard fans were fed up and bored with this predictable garbage. It always made me laugh that ELP attempted to make comebacks with the same junk in '85, '92, '94, even though the entire musical world was well aware that they were out of date the minute they released this crummy first album of theirs. What a joke. I seriously recommend checking out either The Nice or early King Crimson if you have any interest in these guys.
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator Honorary Collaborator Joined: March 23 2005 Location: Caerdydd Status: Offline Points: 32995 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 08:13 | ||
EMERSON LAKE & PALMER (ELP) Pictures at an Exhibition
Review (Permanent link) by duhkhaboy @ 8:25:16 PM EST, 2/21/2005 — This is my favorite ELP record. But it still follows the same predictable elp formula of ripping off some old piece of classical music. Then have Keith Emerson show off his latest gizmos and chops. Then some fancy sloppilly played Keith Moon style drumming. And then you have a couple soft Greg Lake sweet songs for the chicks. Its hard to belive that stuff like this ever sold. That is was ever ranked in the same category as bands such as Yes, Genesis, and Rush, is beyond my imagination. Elp has never had any idea how to develop a concept beyond showing of the individual chops of its members. At no time does the band play together as a cohesive whole. Its always three separate egos vying for recognition, with the obvious result of having the inferrior musicianship of Palmer and Lake being drowned out by the mighty Emerson. Thank god for the birth of heavy metal, with the likes of Tony Iommi and Edward Van Halen which finally put the nail in the coffin of the flamboyant self-indulgent organist. Unfortunatley, Emerson never realized that real songs, and strong inspiring lyrical concepts are more important, and more moving to the casual musician and fan than any organ solo or synthesized noise. I have always believed that it was ELP that single-handedly killed the image of what prigressive rock was supposed to be and let heavy metal takes it place.
...and I believe that you are a complete and utter w**ker!
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Sean Trane
Special Collaborator Prog Folk Joined: April 29 2004 Location: Heart of Europe Status: Offline Points: 20239 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 08:21 | ||
Hi Snowie, Obvously you do not agree with this guy (actually neither do I), but if memory serves me well his reviews have been discussed before and they were thought to be valid enough to have them stay in the Archives. Those are to be classified along with Karn Evil Nein's review of BSS. Better ignored! |
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let's just stay above the moral melee
prefer the sink to the gutter keep our sand-castle virtues content to be a doer as well as a thinker, prefer lifting our pen rather than un-sheath our sword |
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Lindsay Lohan
Forum Senior Member Joined: May 25 2005 Location: Norway Status: Offline Points: 3254 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 08:26 | ||
this is one of the most annoying reviews i have seen SPOCK'S BEARD Day For Night — SPOCK'S BEARD music is a mix between everything you love with progressive rock. Some are saying that they are just plagiarism, while some are saying that SPOCK'S BEARD is the future promise of progressive rock. My opinion is that I don't care whether they are clones or not because I simply love SPOCK'S BEARD's music. Their music is a melting pot of a numerous of progressive and symphonic bands that you can't resist to love: EMERSON, LAKE & PALMER, GENESIS, GENTLE GIANT, KANSAS, KING CRIMSON, MARILLION, PINK FLOYD, RUSH and YES together with a big amount of BEATLES, EAGLES and ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA. SPOCK'S BEARD's songs often contains very catchy melodies and choruses, but also complex compositions. Dave Mero's bass playing is reminiscent to Geddy Lee (RUSH) and Chris Squire (YES). NEAL MORSE's voice is reminiscent to Jeff Lynne (ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA) and Paul McCARTNEY. - "Day for Night" contains a great Hammond intro, and it also has some great Mellotron in it. A great opener with a catchy chorus! - "Gibberish" are showing just how great voices SPOCK'S BEARD has. This song is reminiscent to "Thoughts" from their 1996 release "Beware of Darkness", and the GENTLE GIANT's song "Knots" from the "Octopus" album from 1973. You can also hear some YES influences. There's also some beautiful Mellotron present. One of the highlights on this CD. - "Skin" is a catchy Pop tune with BEATLES and ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA reminiscences. - "The Distance to the Sun" is a rather average slow ballad with some reminiscences to EAGLES and SIMON & GARFUNKEL regarding the vocals. It's almost all acoustic. - "Crack in the Sky" starts off with a tricky drum intro. It is a typical SPOCK'S BEARD track with some Jazz-Rock and YES influences, and it contains great Rickenbacker bass together with some nice Hammond, Mellotron and Organ. The song has a catchy chorus too, and there's also a sax solo done by a man named John Garr. This song is one of the highlights. - "Gypsy" has got a very seventies sound that reminds of BEATLES, ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA and GENESIS with lots of Mellotron. This song is very complex with intricate chord progressions. One of the album's highlights. - "Can't Get It Wrong" has got a nice piano and cello opening with a clear BEATLES influence as well as ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA. A nice pop ballad with great vocals!. Once you've heard it, it's hard to get it out of you head. - "The Healing Colours of Sound (Part 1)" is an instrumental track with GENESIS influences and Mellotron. One of the album's highlights. - "My Shoes" is a quiet song with some beautiful piano and Hammond, but it's one of the albums weakest tracks although it has a catchy chorus. - "Mommy comes back" is a rather average track even though it's typical SPOCK'S BEARD track with great guitar playing and a catchy chorus. Sometimes it reminds a little of "Thoughts" or PINK FLOYD. - "Lay it down" is a mellow and beautiful slow ballad that has a nice melody and some Peter GABRIEL and MARILLION reminiscences. - "The Healing Colours of Sound" has some nice piano playing as well as some GENTLE GIANT reminiscences. This is one of the highlights on this album. - "My Shoes (Revisited)" has got the theme from "My Shoes" as the title reveals. It also has Mellotron mayhem at the ending. Lovely! - "Hurt" is a bonus track on the European release, written by Dean Chamberlain. It's a real good straight rocker with heavy guitar riffs, but it doesn't fit in with the rest of the album. The cover artwork could have been taken from a new RUSH album as it's reminiscent to Hugh Syme's works. All in all this is a very interesting and varied album that is very typical SPOCK'S BEARD, and surely will attract every true SPOCK'S BEARD fan. And as usual there's loads of Mellotron. This is one of the top releases this year. Recommended!
...although it meets the requirements...my god is it annoying! |
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Sean Trane
Special Collaborator Prog Folk Joined: April 29 2004 Location: Heart of Europe Status: Offline Points: 20239 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 08:32 | ||
EMERSON LAKE & PALMER (ELP) Brain Salad Surgery
Review (Permanent link) by duhkhaboy @ 2:44:39 AM EST, 2/22/2005 — Okay I know everyone is going to hate this review. But this album was the one single album ever made that made it an embarassment for truly great bands to label themselves as "progressive rock". After this album all great prog bands distanced themselves from that categorization. Brain Salad Surgery is simply the weakest and most banal album of the prog rock era. This album was so insipid in its concept as to inspire the entire "punk rock" revolution of the late seventies. Apart from "Toccata" there is absoluelty nothing on this record that could be considered "progressive" in either concept or form. I'm sorry, but one of the world's most popular rock bands doing a rendition of a church tune (i.e. Jerusalem) ain't too rebellious. Totally weak and dry. Not groundbreaking in any way. C'est La Vie is your typical candy assed Greg Lake ballad, only the title is French as to make it seem more artistic for some reason. As if we can be fooled by such obvious cliches. But finally we come to the "great" centerpiece. The typical "prog" side-long epic Karn Evil 9. Karn Evil 9 is the silliest lyrical delivery ever to pose as a true prog epic ever put to tape. This song is so weak and stupid that it bring instant chuckles to anyone under 45 that hears it today. There is no way that ELP was going to "blow anyones head apart" at this point in their career. Its a total laugh. It's total cheese. And everyone in the world knew it except for die hard ELP fans. To compare the delivery of Karn Evil 9 to either Close to the Edge or Supper's Ready, is a complete waste of time. Karn Evil 9 does not have the brilliant dynamics, texture, and lyrical depth to ever be ranked in the same category of the great side long epics of the era. Karn Evil 9 is just a silly song that so happens to be around twenty minutes long. So What! Brain Salad Surgery killed ELP. Brain Salad Surgery killed "progressive rock".......the sad part is that ELP fans will not admit this fact. They fool themselves into believing that ELP's death came later ...after "love Beach" or something. But anyone with two ears, a brainand a semi decent feel for rhythm can hearthis album and tell that it stinks. This album was the death of prog.
Here is the Dukhaboy review that was discussed at great lenghts with Linda/3F8s howling for murder!!!! Aside from the guy mentioning C'est La vie (which will appear three years later), we found it valid enough to keep!
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let's just stay above the moral melee
prefer the sink to the gutter keep our sand-castle virtues content to be a doer as well as a thinker, prefer lifting our pen rather than un-sheath our sword |
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Lindsay Lohan
Forum Senior Member Joined: May 25 2005 Location: Norway Status: Offline Points: 3254 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 08:37 | ||
^ Well the thing that i DON'T like is that he seems to be on a mindless slaughter frenzy for a band that he strongly dislikes...I mean i could do the same for queen and state that it lacks melodies, texture, lyrical depths and all the good old cliches and make it a valid album review...but still i feel that this would be reviews made more out of HATE than any serious music reviewing...so well... |
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator Honorary Collaborator Joined: March 23 2005 Location: Caerdydd Status: Offline Points: 32995 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 08:44 | ||
Thanks Sean for your comments, bvut there so many untruths and suppositions disguised as truth, that I feel that this BSS reveiw is absolutely worthless! maybe we should look art these review again! This may be a bit sad, but I actually find that review offensive! |
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Lindsay Lohan
Forum Senior Member Joined: May 25 2005 Location: Norway Status: Offline Points: 3254 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 08:51 | ||
The 5 typical trademarks of a HATE driven review: 1.The use of cliches(The lyrics are poor, the music is cheesy, etc etc) 2.The band is really famous and rated as one of the greats. 3.The comparishment with other bands(How can anyone think this is better than... You should rather listen to...) 4.Exagerations and use of strong words(The worst band ever!, No-one can play their instruments right.) 5.Bashing of fans in the review.(They are so stupid to listen to this music..etc etc)
Edited by maidenrulez |
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Sean Trane
Special Collaborator Prog Folk Joined: April 29 2004 Location: Heart of Europe Status: Offline Points: 20239 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 10:44 | ||
As I said, far from me to agree with what he has written , but if you are so bothered by these reviews , it is maybe because you take it too much at heart. I realize fully that not taking it so personal is much easier said than done, but this is the only way out. There is always going to be someone that will shoot what you love. You might as well forget about those opposing views, or else frustrations will always be behind the corner. Besides the fact that there are another three reviews that gives an equally bad rating and I rated the album with a 2* myself>>>> BSS is a very controversial album and open review sites like this one will offer many viewpoints both negative and positive. And when you know that writing an intelligent negative review is actually very hard and most people abstain preferring to focus on the albums they like.......... Edited by Sean Trane |
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let's just stay above the moral melee
prefer the sink to the gutter keep our sand-castle virtues content to be a doer as well as a thinker, prefer lifting our pen rather than un-sheath our sword |
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The Miracle
Prog Reviewer Joined: May 29 2005 Location: hell Status: Offline Points: 28427 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 22:02 | ||
CARAVAN "In the Land of Grey and Pink"
Review (Permanent link) by Cooper the negro Posted 9:36:27 PM EST, 11/16/2005 Lest us say this is grood. Real Grood. Its all about people climbing into your chimney, just kidding silly butts its about getting stoned. All I have to say is it is really good. If you don't like it then shut up because you should. Its so laid back, something to listen to with your lady friends (For you dudes out there reading this horrible review). Well all I've got to say is you should get some pipe weed, and sit down and chillax to this album. I'm listening to it now and its just so soothing! Magnificent!
Purchase this album at a store near yourself! Funny, but slightly inappropriate
And can anyone explain what does Caravan have to do with weed? Edited by The Miracle |
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Drew
Forum Senior Member Joined: June 20 2005 Location: California Status: Offline Points: 12600 |
Posted: November 16 2005 at 23:26 | ||
i actually think there is some merit to that quote about elp |
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Sean Trane
Special Collaborator Prog Folk Joined: April 29 2004 Location: Heart of Europe Status: Offline Points: 20239 |
Posted: November 17 2005 at 02:59 | ||
As I mentioned about the previous review that came under fire on this very same page, the title track is an open call to smokers!
What do you think the punk weed is? |
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let's just stay above the moral melee
prefer the sink to the gutter keep our sand-castle virtues content to be a doer as well as a thinker, prefer lifting our pen rather than un-sheath our sword |
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Andrea Cortese
Special Collaborator Honorary Collaborator Joined: September 05 2005 Status: Offline Points: 4411 |
Posted: November 17 2005 at 05:35 | ||
RIVERSIDE "Out Of Myself" voices in my head voices in my head voices in my head voices in my head voices in my head voices in my head voices in my head .....in my head simple the best this kind of debium that every band is dreaming for...
ehmm....
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Easy Livin
Special Collaborator Honorary Collaborator / Retired Admin Joined: February 21 2004 Location: Scotland Status: Offline Points: 15585 |
Posted: November 17 2005 at 06:47 | ||
Sorry guys, just catching up! Thanks for the pointers, I'll have a look at them. MR, as you say, those 5 points are pretty much the essence of poor reviews. |
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator Honorary Collaborator Joined: March 23 2005 Location: Caerdydd Status: Offline Points: 32995 |
Posted: November 17 2005 at 14:09 | ||
EMERSON LAKE & PALMER (ELP) "Brain Salad Surgery" A pompous, inarticulate and above all boring album that doesn't belong in any proper progressive collection. For collectors only. Didn't like it when it was first released, like it even less now. As a fan of the members of this trio - like many other folks - it was a major disappointment to see them leave their former groups to create ELP. Give me King Crimson, the Nice and Atomic Rooster anyday over ELP.
I guess this is ok too, but to say that it doesn't belong in any proper prog collection is plain wrong,to my mind! Ok I,m an ELP fan thats true, but I'd feel the same if any band was bashed thus in a review!
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Easy Livin
Special Collaborator Honorary Collaborator / Retired Admin Joined: February 21 2004 Location: Scotland Status: Offline Points: 15585 |
Posted: November 17 2005 at 14:15 | ||
I sent one of my e-mails to JDM.
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stonebeard
Forum Senior Member Joined: May 27 2005 Location: NE Indiana Status: Offline Points: 28057 |
Posted: November 17 2005 at 15:33 | ||
PENDRAGON The Jewel
Review (Permanent link) by Jim Young @ 11:32:56 AM EST, 3/27/2005 — The Worst thing that i've ever had to listen in my whole life... I won't give Bad because of "The Black Knight", which is really bad, but not that bad... This is torture... Only to crazy people (in bad sense of the word)...
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chopper
Special Collaborator Honorary Collaborator Joined: July 13 2005 Location: Essex, UK Status: Offline Points: 20029 |
Posted: November 17 2005 at 15:40 | ||
^ "The Black Knight", which is really bad, but not that bad..."
How can something be really bad, but not that bad??? |
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sbrushfan
Forum Senior Member Joined: November 07 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 1177 |
Posted: November 17 2005 at 16:16 | ||
RUSH Moving Pictures
Review (Permanent link) by Symphonic Age @ 4:06:20 PM EST, 6/17/2005 — Finally the Rush dare to a fine disc to if same and there succeed! To the face of a lot of imitators (Dream Theatre in primis) that I sharpen imitate, song like "YYZ", "Tom Sawyer" or "Witch Hunt" are inimitable (and the first two I consider them Hard Rock to the pure state while "Witch Hunt" the masterpiece of the Symphonic Art Rock!) You ponder imitators... You ponder!
HUH?
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Some world views are spacious, and some are merely spaced...
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