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HackettFan View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 13 2016 at 23:04
Caffeine destroys families.
A curse upon the heads of those who seek their fortunes in a lie. The truth is always waiting when there's nothing left to try. - Colin Henson, Jade Warrior (Now)
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 00:33
5 is a large number when you're Guatemalan.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 00:36

Unusual fortune cookie messages #289: "Please, fondle my buttocks."

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I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 00:40
My sister is the whore you wanted all along, Mr. Como.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 00:52
Stuffed grumbled.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 09:18

After a day of food being unloaded into the toilet intact, I soon realized that my stomach had disappeared. Fortunately, the IT helpdesk expert found it in my clipboard and pasted it back in place. Now I can go back to pooping with a smile on my face.

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i'm shopping for a new oil-cured sinus bag
that's a happy bag of lettuce
this car smells like cartilage
nothing beats a good video about fractions
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 09:20
I upgraded my bellybutton to a four-prong 30-amp connection. Now I can hook up the dryer.
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i'm shopping for a new oil-cured sinus bag
that's a happy bag of lettuce
this car smells like cartilage
nothing beats a good video about fractions
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 09:22
I eat umlauts, more so on Tuesdays.
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i'm shopping for a new oil-cured sinus bag
that's a happy bag of lettuce
this car smells like cartilage
nothing beats a good video about fractions
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 10:05
So many types of cucumbers.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 10:08
Water is wet
fire is hot
when I sneeze
out comes snot
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 11:00
^ You have my nomination for the Lunar Poet Laureate. I think they give you free coupons and a bar of soap.
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i'm shopping for a new oil-cured sinus bag
that's a happy bag of lettuce
this car smells like cartilage
nothing beats a good video about fractions
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 11:03
I asked the geneticist for tusks but ended up with a second exit for my colon.
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i'm shopping for a new oil-cured sinus bag
that's a happy bag of lettuce
this car smells like cartilage
nothing beats a good video about fractions
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 11:05
Donald Trump's colon is made out of cinder blocks and bus tokens.
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i'm shopping for a new oil-cured sinus bag
that's a happy bag of lettuce
this car smells like cartilage
nothing beats a good video about fractions
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 11:09
Cardboard today, windshield wipers tomorrow.
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i'm shopping for a new oil-cured sinus bag
that's a happy bag of lettuce
this car smells like cartilage
nothing beats a good video about fractions
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 13:30
Originally posted by progaardvark progaardvark wrote:

^ You have my nomination for the Lunar Poet Laureate. I think they give you free coupons and a bar of soap.

Embarrassed

You have alot of pull for that organization so it means the world to me, my dog, my dog's chew toy, my dog's chew toy's inner emptiness, and my dog's chew toy inner emptiness' hotcake recipe.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 13:33
Rogue ass, sunburned again.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 15:27
I am sexual when I eat pancreases.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 15:53
You are the manifestation of my desires.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 16:49
Your gums are bleeding all over my new tablecloth.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Jazz-Rock/Fusion/Canterbury Team

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 14 2016 at 17:11
Boss rutabaga.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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