The rules of Prog club...

Fun rules, right?

1. Never come to a meeting of "prog" cultists in heels!

2. Never use pommade or hair spray to a meeting of prog'rs

3. Make sure that you wrinkle your Wilson's House of Leather's coat really good, before you come to the meeting of prog'rs.

4. If you look like a left over version of Haight-Ashbury, you came to the wrong meeting ... that one went that way along with YES.

5. Leave the "dolly" at home. We're not here showcasing how many dolls we ... wait ... we only discuss how many scales that bass player did in 4 seconds! Not how many _____ he clicked on in a given period of time! If you are blonde with blue eyes, you are in the wrong club. This is not the millionaires club, or the cocayne club!

6. When we get old, we all get to go to special cruise! Your name will be quickly forgotten and your appreciation will gladly be taken with your money, and you get to take a memory to your grave!

Inside the club rules:

1. All bands have keyboards and they are more important than anything else.

2. All bands have a sort of semi-literary content so people think they are more intelligent than they really are.

3. All bands have a lead singer who has to tell us a story, because we do not want to be guessing what it is all about.

4. All bands have to have slightly artistic, (quasi artistic?) so we think there is more here than meets the eye

5. None of these bands can have a HIPGNOSIS cover, because that is a dead give away if the music is good or not! And it is NEVER progressive, because they are all too weird and no one can handle them!

6. We never go to Pink Floyd parties, and we do not have their posters. Way too cliche and cliquish!

7. We have pictures of Kate Bush on the wall in costumes, because she is GOOD LOOKING and Peter Gabriel is NOT!

8. We do not listen to progressive music in Spanish, French and Italian, and even then, only behind closed doors away from the members. Those aren't progressive. They are copies of the original! We only listen to the top ten!

9. We post vehemently on PA to show our knowledge and how much music we listen to!

10. And lastly ... we do not need Dave to tell us anything! The Top Ten is dead, except at PA and USA Today!