Off At Tangents: Tip Bin Shuffle

Porterhouse steak face.  

The Canadian Boxer Rebellion and Other Unlikely Events 

Skip the haggis this time Cyril.

It would be difficult but not impossible for Linda to fight the urge to call and order the "Tanzanian Garnet" Bangle mounted in "Nickel-free silver" from the BestByze Network.   She had no use for any jewelry of any kind for any reason, but the price had dropped from $400.00 to $12.99 in a matter of moments and the time left to get one was quickly slipping away.  Further, the show's host, a very nice man named Curtis, was beside himself with astonishment that this unusually high-quality and rare item was going for such a price.   Surely it was a mistake, insisted Curtis, some mix-up behind the scenes that was now too late to change, to the dismay of the network but glee of the customer at home.   You can't afford not to buy it, Curtis pointed out.   The opportunity was rapidly passing, there was no doubt about it.  

Twelve Angry Menses 

The OCOTOW (Official Commission Of Tug Of War)has changed the physical specifications of the rope that is to be used in all serious and internationally recognized games, events, and tournaments. Please ask your official Tug Of War provider for the details so you are not left out in the cold.

Rejected James Bond Titles #11: You Only Live Once, Unless You Believe In Reincarnation Then It'll Be An Endless Repeating Cycle Of Birth, Life, Death, Until There Is Peace Within The Universe (Part II)

I get extremely aroused when people correct my German pronunciations.

oh Whit a garlic staple foot sl*g.htering., grey stound-a-shing diagonals of infinite strokes of oreo-dimensional shapshifters,. Stoned they shall [be] growth Imprisoned they shall [grow]., where does the cave end and the future start,. Rise like a raspberry ., ?