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Chicapah 
Prog Reviewer
Joined: February 14 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8238
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 Posted: November 10 2009 at 18:41 |
 Kotro wrote:
If you don't mind a healthy dose of witty sarcasm, Iain's (Exitthelemming) reviews are alwaysa treat. |
Amen to that. He's one of the few who consistently make me spit my milk.
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"Literature is well enough, as a time-passer, and for the improvement and general elevation and purification of mankind, but it has no practical value" - Mark Twain
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Eetu Pellonpaa
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: June 17 2005
Location: Finland
Status: Offline
Points: 4828
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Posted: November 11 2009 at 22:19 |
 Thank you for sharing these!
Easy Livin wrote:
If you don't believe me, check the New Grove Dictionary of music and musicians. If you just happen to have Vol 20 of the 1980 edition handy (what do you mean, you don't have a copy? Shame on you all) then, turn to page 644. SEE, I TOLD YOU SO! |
Well, every credible music fan do have their obligations, no?
Easy Livin wrote:
What a shame! The music consists in 2-3 humming refrigerators at the same time, plus a portative fan that turns back and forth to make the anyway inexistent rhythm, and finally a coming cluster of threatening killer bees! There are tons of albums better than this one to describe the desolation once you go alone on Mars! |
 I thought the voyage was longer, outside the solar system, and i have not heard many bands successing more in the way of describing isolation, but I understand the album is not liked. 
Easy Livin wrote:
When I heard title track, I was blown away by the strenght of horns, and beautyness of organs. |
Easy Livin wrote:
Translator classics |
Maybe this would be a new artistic dogma method of doing reviews; Do the original review in French, Spanish or other non-English language, then use translator and submit without edits.
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Marty McFly
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: March 23 2009
Location: Czech Republic
Status: Offline
Points: 3968
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Posted: November 12 2009 at 01:22 |
And what about submitting Portuguese reviews for Brazil artists, French for France/Canada (when their Canadian, you can choose English or French language) etc :)
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There's a point where "avant-garde" and "experimental" becomes "terrible" and "pointless," -Andyman1125 on Lulu  Even my
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Atavachron
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: September 30 2006
Location: Pearland
Status: Offline
Points: 65550
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Posted: November 12 2009 at 01:39 |
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how about fictitious translator classics -
"Not even shiny or welted but if only that was brought regarding notation and regular outgoing grains. The band was a heaven cave and could believe the swims it was doing, fast eat, normal quiver, or bristle. Very, three could not go to a hill and four could not jump into the rain."
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chopper
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: July 13 2005
Location: Essex, UK
Status: Offline
Points: 20032
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Posted: November 12 2009 at 07:22 |
Pekka wrote:
Easy Livin wrote:
Around 14 edged impressions , marks precisely a pulse of hypnotic to sound paralyzed casual mood, in the frail of depicting a tense, a swallowed or a marginalized thrilling act. Not totally in the mood of the picture and only in that, the soundtrack still cohabitates the most prominent audiotage character from the high spirit or recurring act inside the roll, and a pickling from Tangerine Dream’s own recording poise and backdrops.
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I swear I've heard Cedric Bixler-Zavala sing these lines. |
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Sean Trane
Special Collaborator
Prog Folk
Joined: April 29 2004
Location: Heart of Europe
Status: Offline
Points: 20404
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Posted: November 12 2009 at 07:26 |
"First of all let me say, if you're one of those strange people who continually get confused and can't tell the difference between MASTURBATION and GUITAR PLAYING let me straighten you out: BOTH CAN BE FUN but only if you remember that it's the GUITAR and AMPLIFIER you stick the jack plugs into. . . I hope that's clarified the situation. If you're still confused then remind me never, I repeat, never to go and see you play guitar in public, or at least remind me not to stand in the front row. Now to the review."
I swear I have nothing to do with this one, and I have no wish to associate with this, either 
harmonium.ro wrote:
"be careful not to be playing to this as you try to get into the pants of this girl you've been trying to seduce because she will flee and you will hate this album (EL you know who you are!)"
Is this one of those short Sean Trane reviews?
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theoretically (if mermory serves) this was one or two sentence of VDGG reviews, but when I rewrote them.... I chose to keep it 
ClemofNazareth wrote:
Easy Livin wrote:
Translator classics:
- Nothing to obtain to your mice any worms before and with salt caves.
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This would make for a great A Silver Mt. Zion song title |
ROTFLMAO
Edited by Sean Trane - November 12 2009 at 07:30
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let's just stay above the moral melee
prefer the sink to the gutter
keep our sand-castle virtues
content to be a doer
as well as a thinker,
prefer lifting our pen
rather than un-sheath our sword
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Easy Livin
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator / Retired Admin
Joined: February 21 2004
Location: Scotland
Status: Offline
Points: 15585
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Posted: November 12 2009 at 10:22 |
Wondered when you'd get here Hugues!
In the words of Emma Bunton "What took you so long"!
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Sean Trane
Special Collaborator
Prog Folk
Joined: April 29 2004
Location: Heart of Europe
Status: Offline
Points: 20404
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Posted: November 16 2009 at 08:55 |
Easy Livin wrote:
Wondered when you'd get here Hugues!
In the words of Emma Bunton "What took you so long"! |
I posted on the first page, I think  !!!
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let's just stay above the moral melee
prefer the sink to the gutter
keep our sand-castle virtues
content to be a doer
as well as a thinker,
prefer lifting our pen
rather than un-sheath our sword
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npjnpj
Forum Senior Member
Joined: December 05 2007
Location: Germany
Status: Offline
Points: 2720
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Posted: November 26 2009 at 04:32 |
This is not a direct quote, but this phrase turns up loads of times, and I love it:
'This band sounds like Genesis, Jethro Tull, Pink Floyd, King Crimson, and Yes, but they have their own sound and identity'.
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toroddfuglesteg
Forum Senior Member
Retired
Joined: March 04 2008
Location: Retirement Home
Status: Offline
Points: 3658
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Posted: November 30 2009 at 09:40 |
Oh no. I have been found out.
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ClemofNazareth
Special Collaborator
Prog Folk Researcher
Joined: August 17 2005
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 4659
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Posted: November 30 2009 at 11:56 |
Easy Livin wrote:
Wondered when you'd get here Hugues!
In the words of Emma Bunton "What took you so long"! |
Speaking of which, some classic Sean Trane:
"Stay away from this album, you little punks . ;-) "
"The only Drastic Measure that I will take (outside writing this review) is take this vinyl (I never bought it, but I stole from my neighbour) and turn it into a frisbee for my other neighbour's dog."
"you better sit down because if you are not you will hurt yourself falling on your ass because of the sheer mediocrity of this album."
"one of the worst piece(s) of crap that would be included in these Archives . Well I'm exagerating a bit to drive my point home as everyone of their later records will exceed the crappiness of this one."
"Get a Britney Spears Lp, destroy the Cd and this one along, throw away the JT sleeve but keep the Spears one as it is definitely more valuable (much cuter, anyway) than this completely awful JT album" (Jethro Tull's Under Wraps)
"Maybe someday I will re-listen to this 80's album. Preferably after they put me Nine Feet Underground."
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"Peace is the only battle worth waging."
Albert Camus
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paragraph7
Forum Groupie
Joined: April 06 2009
Location: Finland
Status: Offline
Points: 100
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Posted: December 01 2009 at 12:47 |
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My favorite is the one where Sean Trane tells us about his problems getting laid in Moodys Nights In White Satin.
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What you cannot speak of, you have to pass on in silence.
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Roland113
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: March 30 2008
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Status: Offline
Points: 3843
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Posted: December 24 2009 at 06:56 |
Not to toot my own horn, but I was reading about the new King's X live CD and stumbled across my old review of XV and literally laughed out loud at this one. To the best of my knowledge, King's X started out as a positive influence, almost Christian, band.
I say this because one of my earlier bands modeled ourselves after them. This was back in the early
nineties for those of you that are keeping score at home. So we patterned ourselves after King's X,
we weren't overtly Christian, we didn't preach because we didn't want to alienate the non-religious.
Well, that and I was the black sheep of the band, I was the guy that the rest of the band wanted to
convert, there was only so much preachiness that I could tolerate. Regardless, all of our songs did
have positive or thought provoking lyrics. We avoided the hard rock clichés of bangin' hoes and
swinging deals . . . or what ever the kids are doing these days . . . We didn't have shoes back then either, if we stepped on an ungrounded patch cord, we felt it . . .
and we had to carry our own amps too. Now where'd my pants go?
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-------someone please tell him to delete this line, he looks like a noob-------
I don't have an unnatural obsession with Disney Princesses, I have a fourteen year old daughter and coping mechanisms.
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Vibrationbaby
Forum Senior Member
Joined: February 13 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 6898
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Posted: December 24 2009 at 11:41 |
ClemofNazareth wrote:
Easy Livin wrote:
Wondered when you'd get here Hugues!
In the words of Emma Bunton "What took you so long"! |
Speaking of which, some classic Sean Trane:
"Stay away from this album, you little punks . ;-) "
"The only Drastic Measure that I will take (outside writing this review) is take this vinyl (I never bought it, but I stole from my neighbour) and turn it into a frisbee for my other neighbour's dog."
"you better sit down because if you are not you will hurt yourself falling on your ass because of the sheer mediocrity of this album."
"one of the worst piece(s) of crap that would be included in these Archives . Well I'm exagerating a bit to drive my point home as everyone of their later records will exceed the crappiness of this one."
"Get a Britney Spears Lp, destroy the Cd and this one along, throw away the JT sleeve but keep the Spears one as it is definitely more valuable (much cuter, anyway) than this completely awful JT album" (Jethro Tull's Under Wraps)
"Maybe someday I will re-listen to this 80's album. Preferably after they put me Nine Feet Underground."
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Another one : " Yes was never music to fondle your girlfriend to". ( Relayer review )
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clarke2001
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: June 14 2006
Location: Croatia
Status: Offline
Points: 4160
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Posted: December 24 2009 at 16:35 |
Atavachron wrote:
how about fictitious translator classics -
"Not even shiny or welted but if only that was brought regarding notation and regular outgoing grains. The band was a heaven cave and could believe the swims it was doing, fast eat, normal quiver, or bristle. Very, three could not go to a hill and four could not jump into the rain."
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It's not the sun or sewing, but only to the concept of going outside and regular crops. The
curve of heaven and earth and the hole can not believe that these
activities, swimming, fast food, and general vibration, or poetry. They can go three or four mountains, I can not dance in the rain.
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Atavachron
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: September 30 2006
Location: Pearland
Status: Offline
Points: 65550
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Posted: December 24 2009 at 23:37 |
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halabalushindigus
Forum Senior Member
Joined: November 05 2009
Location: San Diego
Status: Offline
Points: 1438
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Posted: December 25 2009 at 09:41 |
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Funny how? Like I'm a Clown, I amuse you, that kind of funny....
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assume the power 1586/14.3
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Mr. Maestro
Forum Senior Member
Joined: March 05 2010
Location: Knowhere, USA
Status: Offline
Points: 918
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Posted: March 05 2010 at 18:51 |
Bonnek's four-star review of ELP's Tarkus begins:
"This is a hard nut to crack. It's nothing less then essential but it's not really very good."
At least I found it funny, anyways.
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