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mystic fred View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Topic: no faith in the post office...
    Posted: September 29 2009 at 15:08
There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses.

One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about. The letter read:


Dear God,

I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension.
Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension payment. Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with, have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope. Can you please help me?

Sincerely, Edna

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars.

By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman. The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.

Christmas came and went. A few days later, another letter came from the same old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened.

It read:
 

Dear God,

How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift.

By the way, there was $4 missing.... I think it might have been those thieving b*****ds at the post office.

Sincerely, Edna
 
LOL
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 29 2009 at 15:12
LOL
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 29 2009 at 15:16
LOL

That's too funny.  Here's one of my favorite epistolary jokes:

A certain English lady visited Switzerland and was having difficulty finding a room, so she asked the local schoolmaster to help her. After a satisfactory room had been found, she returned to her home and did some packing.

Suddenly, it occured to her that she hadn't noticed a W.C. (in England, the toilet is called a Water Closet), so she wrote the schoolmaster about the W.C.

The Schoolmaster, not knowing the meaning, asked the parish priest and together they decided that it must mean "Wayside Chapel." He wrote her the following letter:


Dear Madame,

It is my pleasure to inform you that there is a W.C. just 9 miles from your home, in the center of a grove of pine trees. It seats 229 people, and it is open on Thursdays and Sundays. This is an unfortunate situation if you are in the habit of going regularly. You will, no
doubt, be glad to hear that some people bring their lunches and make a day of it.

I would especially recommend Thursdays, for then there is an Organ accompaniment. The accoustics in the W.C. are excellent; even the most delicate sound can be heard.

My son was married in the W.C. and there was such a rush for seats that 10 people had to sit in the same seat. The looks on their faces were very interesting.

My wife is sickly but dedicated. She doesn't go regularly, and she hasn't gone for nearly a year.

I will be glad to reserve a seat in the W.C. for you, where you will be seen and heard by everyone.

Hoping I have been of some assistance.

Sincerely yours,
The Schoolmaster
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 29 2009 at 15:18
They've never stolen anything from me, but they do seem to enjoy wrinkling books and breaking CD cases. Angry
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 29 2009 at 15:23
LOL

Both.
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Dean View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 29 2009 at 15:25
It's nice to see the letter containing that original copy of Steve's joke has finally been delivered... that stamp's worth a few quid now.
What?
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 30 2009 at 03:32
Originally posted by Dean Dean wrote:

It's nice to see the letter containing that original copy of Steve's joke has finally been delivered... that stamp's worth a few quid now.
 
yes it's a  Penny Black LOL
 
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