SR VII - Progressive Rock Music Forum

NOVOGRAD wrote:

KRAYINSK

CHAMELOEN

Chameleon wrote:

HEUSJB4

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Today was full of more adventure than I care for.

This morning I chased down a purse snatcher. He nearly knocked me down running past me and that's when I noticed he had a black handbag. So I gave chase (even through the kitchen of a building, no less), and pursued him into the woods. The thief ran into some old man's yard, and the toothless fellow came out promptly with a handgun. He fired twice in the air. That settled things down about, and I guess it gave the young man (who ran quite fast with his shorts down past his ass) a little perspective about running around with women's accessories.

The criminal didn't go anywhere after that, and moments later, seven police officers arrived carrying M-16s. It turns out a neighbor reported that a man had a gun on another man and that shots had been fired.

They arrested the guy, and this, I kid you not, was his story:

"I found that purse in the bathroom, so I was trying to return it."

Well, I suppose that makes sense.

Maybe the guy believed that he could cover more ground by rushing away from where he found it as fast as he could.

Maybe the guy thought that if he ran fast enough, he could turn back time so the lady wouldn't have lost her belongings in the first place.

Or maybe the guy was a perv who liked hanging out in women's restrooms. Giggity, giggity.

So I had to spend part of my afternoon panting and filling out a statement for the police.

Here's more: A couple of hours ago, some guy rear ended us. The guy said his tires slid on the wet pavement. No one was hurt, and as far as damage to my vehicle is concerned, let's just say the acorns that fall from the trees do more harm. His grill was completely bent out of shape, and the logo was barely hanging on.

He joked that "I guess now would be a good time to put those new parts on my car like I've been wanting to."

Yeah, like maybe a decent set of tires.

Oh, and also my wife spilled an entire bowl of cereal all over herself while sitting at the computer. The keyboard still smells of Resee's Puffs.