The Shed - Progressive Rock Music Forum

There's a battery of poultry jokes here, but nothing to get into a flap about.

Well, at least we're not being hen-pecked.

What?

you boys should start writing yolks for Christmas crackers!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaanyway.............

Dear Shed Persons.......

Do you find that teenagers regularly 'congregate' within close proximity to your personal space?

Do you quietly wish to yourself that they would 'congregate' somewhere else, but feel it impolite to ask?

Well, extensive clinical tests (Ok, hostel based tests) have been carried out over the past 6 months by a team of experts (Ok, me to be precise...

) and an answer has been found.....

You need to invest in a copy of this:

It has been well documented that most teens have an in-built, emotional aversion to most classical music, however the musical structure, tone-colour and (apparently) repetitive nature of the Goldberg Variations induces an immediate stimulous of nausea and irritation, causing imminant dispersal.

While Mr Erg prefers a slightly different version to guarantee his own personal space:

Bach%20-%20Goldberg%20Variations%20%281955%29

I would stick by the 'Jando' version as being especially irksome...

So, just press 'play', sit back and watch the crowds mutter, groan and disperse within about 60 seconds....

(Of course, every remedy has a side effect. In this case, you will find over-enthusiastic, talkative, reminiscing septagenarians taking their place....

)

Music has always been a matter of energy to me. On some nights I believe that a car with the needle on empty can run 50 more miles if you have the right music very loud on the radio. Hunter S Thompson

fandango wrote:

A

Do you find that teenagers regularly 'congregate' within close proximity to your personal space?

Well, yeah....................... but once you've had kids, you just have to count down the days until they leave home!

LOL

(not really, our teens are............ lovely really! Wink

)

don't forget the listening to Dream Theater CDs!

Actually most of the teenagers I know couldn't be arsed about total global domination.

I somehow thought Peter would like that little sequence - all we need now is a photo of a doorknob & there's a whole new furrow to be ploughed.

chopper wrote:

don't forget the listening to Dream Theater CDs

I think that comes under 'raising Satan'

Jon Lord 1941 - 2012

Jim Garten wrote:

there's a whole new furrow to be ploughed.

would the furrowing be carried out by Jethro Tull, by any chance??....

Music has always been a matter of energy to me. On some nights I believe that a car with the needle on empty can run 50 more miles if you have the right music very loud on the radio. Hunter S Thompson

^^to compound the issue, the window sign on the other side of the door suffers from exactly the same spelling...

Peter's going to have a coronary...

Edited by fandango - September 24 2008 at 08:50

Music has always been a matter of energy to me. On some nights I believe that a car with the needle on empty can run 50 more miles if you have the right music very loud on the radio. Hunter S Thompson

certainly explains the new series of 'Casualty':

Jon Lord 1941 - 2012

fandango wrote:

Dean wrote:

^

maybe you just have to live here to see the funny side of it..

I think what went through my mind were the number of our beloved locals who would have been involved in the design, sign construction and installation, who are unable to spell...

Ah, humerous speling erors flie rite over my hed.

What?