Suicide

I get a little worried about anyone who thinks like me.  haha.

Getting very personal:  When I had a lot of pressure, school and family, I got obsessed about the idea of throwing myself off a cliff.  I mean really obsessed with the idea. When I became a little more level-headed, I decided that I should at least take a test run first with a "safety net." I had some friends who had expressed an interest in parachuting, so I went with them.  I was damned scared as I prepared to jump, and it was a blessed relief when that parachute opened and I landed safely.  I haven't thought about throwing myself off a cliff since then.  When you see yourself as living on borrowed time, you can take on challenges that you might not normally take.

There's a line I like from One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest that I like to alter and apply... Instead of obsessing over bad things, "you should be out there batting beavers and clubbing seals".  I know that's very inhumane and I love animals... what was I thinking?  Looks up the real quote, got it quite wrong.  Something about bird-doggin' chickens and bangin' big-toothed rodents. Bestial, anyway.