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thellama73
Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: May 29 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8368
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Topic: Entertain me! Posted: July 14 2007 at 20:34 |
I bought a bottle of my favorite wine, but alas, I have no one to drink with, so I will pretend I am drinking with you, my prog loving friends! Entertain me with your witty replies!
I am also dismayed to see that all the political threads have been locked by the scared-of-a-good-fight admins. It's a pity, I was looking forward to a nice confrontational rant.
Begin.
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1800iareyay
Prog Reviewer
Joined: November 18 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 2492
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 20:44 |
You are an officer and a gentleman, llama.
The political threads were locked because a cur named yargh took all of them off topic by debasing teen members (like myself) who routinely left him unable to say anything intelligent. If you'd like a rant...
Why is is that when a child is abducted in this country they interrupt the sound of every cable channel to broadcast an alert. When I was a kid, I was told not to talk to strangers. I followed the rules, I was safe. Why should I pity some little twit who was all too eager to accept some Skittles from a man in a van?
Not good enough? How about...
Live Earth is a joke. "Let's raise awarness about global warming" they said. They did this by organizing concerts where attendees would wait in traffic for two hours in their SUVs, buy bottles of water which they would discard on the ground, and let's not forget that the equipment needs electricity that comes from the burning of fossil fuels. For a little extra irony, this was conceived by the man whose wife put stickers on albums in the 80s.
Why is all of America in a drought? I thought global warming meant floods were coming.
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thellama73
Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: May 29 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8368
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 20:49 |
Hooray for Dr. Strangelove and hooray for you, sir!
Global Warming in general is a joke, but I think there is hope. Lately people seem to be losing initerest in Al Gore's relentless beating of his dead, dead horse. Hopefully it will all blow over like the Global Cooling scare of the 70's.
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1800iareyay
Prog Reviewer
Joined: November 18 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 2492
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 20:53 |
I can't imagine having him as a president. As much as I hate Bush, at least he's fun. Al Gore sounds like an intelligent Forrest Gump. He has that same slow Southern speech. I would have impaled my eye on a spike by now if he was given constant TV time (which he is now getting. I may be sporting an eye patch soon)
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thellama73
Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: May 29 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8368
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 20:55 |
That would be tremendously stylish. I expect you'd start a trend.
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1800iareyay
Prog Reviewer
Joined: November 18 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 2492
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:03 |
Judging from his avatar, Man Overboard beat me to it . I can imagine it now, the runways of Milan and Paris lined with tattered clothing and limitless ale. It'll look like Oktoberfest gone awry (as if it ever went smoothly).
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thellama73
Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: May 29 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8368
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:10 |
Mmmm ale. Personally, I sport a cheeky (though admittedly work in progress) handlebar moustache and wear fedoras and top hats whenever the weather permits. But some people (like my coworker who, in an unfortunate display of tactlessness referred to my stache as "creepy") Just don't understand. My pocket wacth is starting to die on me and I need a new one. Any recommendations?
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1800iareyay
Prog Reviewer
Joined: November 18 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 2492
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:17 |
Nothin wrong with a stache. My best friend had a staceh with a beard, and I swear to you he looked just like Dustin Diamond from Saved By the Bell. He got so much grief from friends and even customers at his job that he shaved only the stache and left the beard. Now we all think he looks like a rapist. Personally, I wish he had gotten rid of the beard and saved the moustache.
About the watch, I'm afraid I'm no expert. I just go to a store and pick one I like.
Hang on a sec, you have a handlebar moustache with a top hat? Are you a magician?
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clarke2001
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: June 14 2006
Location: Croatia
Status: Offline
Points: 4160
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:18 |
I just finished my third bottle of cider on an empty stomach, semi-drunk, after a fresh fight with my girlfriend and after cutting my half a meter hair long short in the age of 30.
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thellama73
Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: May 29 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8368
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:20 |
1800iareyay wrote:
Hang on a sec, you have a handlebar moustache with a top hat? Are you a magician? |
No, but I'm a juggler! A magician conceals his skills, a juggler flaunts his.
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1800iareyay
Prog Reviewer
Joined: November 18 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 2492
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:21 |
Welcome sir! I was wondering if llama and I would be the only ones enjoying this digital wine. Did you cut the hair yourself, because that would be impressive.
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thellama73
Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: May 29 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8368
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:21 |
clarke2001 wrote:
I just finished my third bottle of cider on an empty stomach, semi-drunk, after a fresh fight with my girlfriend and after cutting my half a meter hair long short in the age of 30.
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I miss fighting with my girlfriend. Now I have no one to fight with.
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1800iareyay
Prog Reviewer
Joined: November 18 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 2492
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:25 |
I fight with the voices in my head. Not often though, because my voices aren't your average vocies. Each one represents a facet of comedy. There's Anecdote, Irony, Observation, Insult, and even Pun. We all gang up on Pun because he's rarely funny. It's easy to beat him because he's quite pun-y (damn you Pun! I didn't give you permission to type that!)
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thellama73
Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: May 29 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8368
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:28 |
Puns are underrated and a gloriously witty form of humor.
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1800iareyay
Prog Reviewer
Joined: November 18 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 2492
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:34 |
I'm trying to rescue the soiled name of Pun, but it's an uphill battle, because so many people don't realize how clever they can be.
I regret to say I'm logging off now. My family and I have been moving furniture and boxes all day to our new home and I'm beat and in need of a shower. Enjoy the wine.
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progismylife
Forum Senior Member
Joined: October 19 2006
Location: ibreathehelium
Status: Offline
Points: 15535
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 21:53 |
Puns are great ways to show how humorless you can be. See my Egg - s/t review to see how bad puns can get. Enjoy the wine my friend, it will be one more year before I can legally join you.
Edited by progismylife - July 14 2007 at 21:53
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thellama73
Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: May 29 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8368
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Posted: July 14 2007 at 23:02 |
My bottle of wine seems to be empty. This is most distressing.
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clarke2001
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: June 14 2006
Location: Croatia
Status: Offline
Points: 4160
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Posted: July 15 2007 at 06:16 |
Good morning everyone. Good morning headache. Hair is still short and it looks horrible - I did it myself, and it's full of "holes".
Anybody wants to share a digital coffee with me? A strong one.
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Dim
Prog Reviewer
Joined: April 17 2007
Location: Austin TX
Status: Offline
Points: 6890
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Posted: July 15 2007 at 13:08 |
I think it would everyone should know tha I voted Bush, and I'm proud of it! Shoot the missiles now, bring it on!
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thellama73
Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: May 29 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 8368
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Posted: July 16 2007 at 12:53 |
I voted for Bush too, and I was in a swing state! Man, I was an unpopular guy that day.
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