How good of a customer are you?

I try to be as considerate as possible, especially because I work at a local grocery store.

Clarke2001

I try not to stare at the cashier's breasts...it seems to maker her nervous.

Depends on my mood, but usually I'm on the more enjoyable end.

I work in retail. People (customers) are retarded, save for a few notable exceptions.
.....................................................


"That's five euro and 10 cents, please".

She sloooooooowly opens the purse, than the wallet, then the coin compartment loaded with euros and coppers and crumpled bills, sloooooowly looking at the coins, then notes, then coins, then notes again while the q is building up. Finally, she takes out a bunch of notes, licks her thumb to separate them and gives me a 50 euro note, sticky of saliva.

My till is desperately empty, no 20, 10 or 5 euro notes, 20 and 10 c coins really low.
"Can I ask you for 10 cents madam if you don't mind?"

Another 4'33" pause. Saliva. Q is ending on the other side of the shop.

"Eeeerrr...(grunt)...nno. I don't have any. S-sorry." She's placing her wallet into the purse much faster now.

Sigh.

I'm running to grab a last few notes from another till, ringing the bell to call the manager (and I know he won't come now because he's on the loo) and approaching back to my till, extending my hand:

"Now. That's 44 euro and 90 cents, thank you very m..."
"Oh, and can I get 10 Benson & Hedges as well?" Without "sorry" or anything.
"We don't do tens. Next, pl..."

Queue is winding around shelves, ending at the doors. People are biting each other.

"Can I get 10 Silk Cut then?"
"We do not do tens of cigarettes!"
"Then give us a Marlboro Lights."
"Twenty Lights, right?" I grabbed the pack of cigs and waved my hand. Scanner went beep.

"TEN Marlboro Lights", saliva complained.
I remained calm but infra-red.
"Madam, you won't find ANY tens of cigarettes in any shop in Dublin. They're not in production any more, that's the new law!"

"Ah, nah." She left the shop. Too slow.

That episode is constantly repating itself, with slight variations, day after day after day.

So, yes, when I am a customer, I'm trying to be nice. I'm trying to be QUICK.

I'm generally seen as a good customer, though it can depend on the service I'm given.  I'm a curteous and respectful customer, and I expect the same from an employee.

I tend to be appreciated more when I spend lots of money regularly at a small independent venue. Interesting.

I used to hang out at this snotty Italian pasta place because one of my friends worked there, and the owner didn't like me coming because I only bought coffees and stuff...I was told I wasn't wanted.

"Oh no he's here"

Me in Halifax Building Society two weeks ago:

Me: Hi, can you print me an up to date statement on this account please. Hands over debit card

Cashier: Er, I'm not sure..one moment please..

Me: ahem..

Cashier: Here is your balance sir.

Me: No, I asked for a statement. I need a statement that lists all my transactions up to midnight last night. It's for a financial assessment.

Cashier: I can request a statement to be sent to you, sir.

Me: and how does that help me today?? You already send me a statement each month. I'm told it's sent on the first of each month, but I dont recieve it until the 16th. God only knows what postal service you're using. Not the same one as the rest of the human race..

Cashier: Sir, our software wont allow us to just 'print statements'

Me: Perhaps it's time for an upgrade to your software, to accomodate this very logical and obvious customer request. They do it at Barclays.

Cashier: you could print a mini statement from the ATM.

Me: Yes, I could, if that option was available today, but it's not. The little man who sits behind the machine writing the mini statements appears to be on leave. I need a statement on headed paper. I could have printed this thing you've just handed me.

Cashier: I'm sorry sir, but..

Me: Give me that. Clicks fingers, gesturing for card to be handed back. Walks out with tail between legs

Basically, when it comes to dealing with customer service folk, I'm a complete banker.

How could anyone not like me!?!?!

The one that gets me riled is the Helpdesk for our business ISP. They only deal with companies, so the majority of people who call them are going to be IT professionals who have exhausted all the possible internal sources of the problem and have rightfully concluded that the reason for the fault must lie with the Service Provider. So why is the first question they always ask: