Favourite Bunk Bed?

 

1. Under-sized bunks. If the individual on top rolls more times than allowed for, he will fall and suffer an extremely painful, but mostly, extremely stupid death; there were efforts to adress this problem making the lower bunk bigger, but it caused the following: the top-bunkerer felt, landed on top of the lower-bunkerer who sadly had rolled all the way to the edge of the lower bunk, so BOTH were killed, so it only made matters worse.

 

2. Over-weighted bunk-users. If the person on top weights over 300 pounds, he's likely to cause the structure to collapse; if the person on the lower bunk weights more than 300 pounds, the top bunk will be denied the "wave effect" (best know for its use in skyscrapers as measure anti-earthquakes) so in case of a oscillation, the structure will be dead-rigid, with no flexibility, and instead of just leaning a bit towards either side, it will break down, collapse, thus killing both the top-bunkerer and the low-bunkerer.

 

3. Poor-designed-ladders. Most people have to climb ladders in order to reach the top bunk. But cases have been reported in which ladders were either built poorly (weak wood), or akwardly (too-stretched steps), or slippery (made with lacquered wood) or, most of all, stupidlly (built in the wrong place, for example: a case was reported in Faroe Islands where the ladder was built in the center of the bunk, in the center of the whole structure, that is, in the middle, so that when the top-bunkerer had to climb it, he crushed his fellow bunkerer's life-creating-hemispheres, thus making him useless, thus forcing him to jump off a bridge)...

 

The solution: don't sleep in bunks. It's bad for you. Try the new concept: ultra-wide floor matresses. They ocuppy more room, it's true, but they allow for more than 5 big persons to sleep on them, with no safety issues whatsoever.

 

 Nah  -- couldn't be....

 

Too late in the game, but the game was over.