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stonebeard
Forum Senior Member
Joined: May 27 2005
Location: NE Indiana
Status: Offline
Points: 28057
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 03:07 |
it's a bonus track on...burnt weenie samich.
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Man With Hat
Collaborator
Jazz-Rock/Fusion/Canterbury Team
Joined: March 12 2005
Location: Neurotica
Status: Offline
Points: 166183
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 03:08 |
You just wanted to say samich didn't you???
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Dig me...But don't...Bury me I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Logos
Prog Reviewer
Joined: March 08 2005
Location: Finland
Status: Offline
Points: 2383
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 06:51 |
Damn you guys.. pick up some pace.. the Mariah Carey thread is 238 pages ahead ( if my math is correct )
Edited by Logos
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: March 23 2005
Location: Caerdydd
Status: Offline
Points: 32995
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 07:09 |
> Three dogs, a Doberman, a Boxer, and a Labrador are sitting in the > > waiting room at the vet's office when they strike up a conversation. > > The Doberman turns to the Boxer and says, "So why are you here?" The > > Boxer replies, "I'm a pisser. I piss on everything, the sofa, the cat, > > the kid but the final straw was last night, when I pissed in the middle > > of my owner's bed." The Doberman says, "So what is the vet going to do?" > > The Boxer said sadly, "Lethal injection," > > The Doberman then turns to the Labrador and asks, "Why are you here?" > > The Lab says, "I'm a digger. I dig under fences, dig up flowers and > > trees. I dig just for the hell of it. When I'm inside, I dig up the > > carpets. I went over the line last night when I dug a great big hole in > > my owner's couch." "So what are they going to do to you?" the Doberman > > inquired. "Lethal injection," the dejected Labrador said. > > The Labrador then turns to the Doberman and asks what he's at the vet's > > office for. "I'm a humper," the Doberman says. "I'll hump anything. I'll > > hump the cat, a pillow, the table, fire hydrants, whatever. I want to > > hump everything I see. Yesterday, my owner had just gotten out of the > > shower and was bending down to dry her toes, and I just couldn't help > > myself. I hopped on her back and started humping away." > > The Boxer and Labrador exchange a sad glance and say, "So, lethal > > injection for you too, huh?" The Doberman says, "No, no, I'm here to get > > my nails clipped." >
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NutterAlert
Forum Senior Member
Joined: June 07 2005
Location: In transition
Status: Offline
Points: 2808
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 07:11 |
^^
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Proud to be an un-banned member since 2005
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Velvetclown
Forum Senior Member
Joined: February 13 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 8548
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 08:12 |
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Man With Hat
Collaborator
Jazz-Rock/Fusion/Canterbury Team
Joined: March 12 2005
Location: Neurotica
Status: Offline
Points: 166183
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 15:37 |
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Dig me...But don't...Bury me I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: March 23 2005
Location: Caerdydd
Status: Offline
Points: 32995
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 15:54 |
Velvetclown wrote:
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fwip..fwip...peeeeblet.....
.....and relax.
Heres another little joke for y'all!
Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day, and they both go before the angel to find out if they'll be admitted to heaven. Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the angel must decide which of them gets in. The angel asks Dolly if there's a particular reason why she should go to heaven, whereupon she takes off her top and says, "Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity."
The angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question. The Queen takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse, shakes it up, and gargles. Then, She spits into the toilet, and pulls the lever.
The angel says, "OK, your Majesty, you may go in." Dolly is outraged and asks, "What was that all about? I show you two of God's own perfect creations, and you turn me down. She simply gargles and she gets in.
Would you explain that to me?" "Sorry, Dolly," says the angel, "but even in heaven, a royal flush beats a pair, no matter how big they are."
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: March 23 2005
Location: Caerdydd
Status: Offline
Points: 32995
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 17:55 |
Got some Jacko jokes, hope you haven't heard them!
>> Q: Why are Michael Jackson's pants so small?
>> A: Because they aren't his!
>>
>> Q: What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?
>> A: Get out of my sun!
>>
>> Q: What do you do if Michael Jackson is drowning?
>> A: Throw him a buoy!
>>
>> Q: Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men??
>> A: He thought it was a delivery service.
>>
>> Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Casper?
>> A: One is pale and scares kids and the other is a friendly ghost.
>>
>> Q: How do we know Michael is guilty?
>> A: Several children have fingered him.
>>
>> Q. Why did Michael Jackson rush over to Wal-Mart?
>> A. He heard that boys' pants were 1/2 off.
>>
>> Q. What's the difference between a supermarket bag and Michael
>> Jackson?
>> A. One is white, made of plastic, and should be kept away from small
>> children. The other is used to hold groceries.
>>
>> Q. How do you know when it's bedtime at the Neverland Ranch?
>> A. When the big hand touches the little hand.
>>
>> Q. What's brown and often found in children's underpants?
>> A. Michael Jackson's hand.
>>
>> Q. What is blonde, has six legs, and roams Michael Jackson's dreams
>> every
>> night?
>> A. Hanson.
>>
>> Q. What the difference between Michael Jackson and acne?
>> A. Acne doesn't come on your face until you're about fifteen.
>>
>> Q. Why can you always win a race with Michael Jackson?
>> A. Because he always likes to come in a little behind.
>>
>> Q. What did Michael Jackson say to Gary Glitter?
>> A. I'll swap you a 10 for two fives
>>
>> Q: Who does Michael Jackson consider a perfect "10"?
>> A: Two 5 year olds.
>>
>> Janet and Michael Jackson were at home one night...
>> Janet: Shall we get a pizza and video tonight?
>> Michael: Yeah, okay, can we get Aladdin?
>> Janet: No, just a pizza and video
>>
>> Q: What famous celebrity had the most children over the last 10 years?
>> A: Michael Jackson
>>
>> Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and greyhound racing?
>> A: The greyhounds wait for the hares to come out.
>>
>> Q: What do Michael and homework have in common?
>> A: Both are a pain in the ass to kids
>>
>> The Pope has issued a proclamation on Michael Jackson:
>> If he hears any more allegations about little boys, the Pope says
>> he'll
>> have no choice but to make him a priest.
>>
>> Michael Jackson and his wife are in the recovery room with their new
>> baby
>> son.
>> The doctor walks in and Michael asks, "Doctor, how long before we can
>> have
>> sex?"
>> "I'd wait until he's at least 14," the doctor replies.
>>
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Logos
Prog Reviewer
Joined: March 08 2005
Location: Finland
Status: Offline
Points: 2383
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 18:22 |
^
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Man With Hat
Collaborator
Jazz-Rock/Fusion/Canterbury Team
Joined: March 12 2005
Location: Neurotica
Status: Offline
Points: 166183
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Posted: August 04 2005 at 19:22 |
Snow Dog wrote:
Got some Jacko jokes, hope you haven't heard them!
>> Q: Why are Michael Jackson's pants so small?
>> A: Because they aren't his!
>>
>> Q: What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?
>> A: Get out of my sun!
>>
>> Q: What do you do if Michael Jackson is drowning?
>> A: Throw him a buoy!
>>
>> Q: Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men??
>> A: He thought it was a delivery service.
>>
>> Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Casper?
>> A: One is pale and scares kids and the other is a friendly ghost.
>>
>> Q: How do we know Michael is guilty?
>> A: Several children have fingered him.
>>
>> Q. Why did Michael Jackson rush over to Wal-Mart?
>> A. He heard that boys' pants were 1/2 off.
>>
>> Q. What's the difference between a supermarket bag and Michael
>> Jackson?
>> A. One is white, made of plastic, and should be kept away from small
>> children. The other is used to hold groceries.
>>
>> Q. How do you know when it's bedtime at the Neverland Ranch?
>> A. When the big hand touches the little hand.
>>
>> Q. What's brown and often found in children's underpants?
>> A. Michael Jackson's hand.
>>
>> Q. What is blonde, has six legs, and roams Michael Jackson's dreams
>> every
>> night?
>> A. Hanson.
>>
>> Q. What the difference between Michael Jackson and acne?
>> A. Acne doesn't come on your face until you're about fifteen.
>>
>> Q. Why can you always win a race with Michael Jackson?
>> A. Because he always likes to come in a little behind.
>>
>> Q. What did Michael Jackson say to Gary Glitter?
>> A. I'll swap you a 10 for two fives
>>
>> Q: Who does Michael Jackson consider a perfect "10"?
>> A: Two 5 year olds.
>>
>> Janet and Michael Jackson were at home one night...
>> Janet: Shall we get a pizza and video tonight?
>> Michael: Yeah, okay, can we get Aladdin?
>> Janet: No, just a pizza and video
>>
>> Q: What famous celebrity had the most children over the last 10 years?
>> A: Michael Jackson
>>
>> Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and greyhound racing?
>> A: The greyhounds wait for the hares to come out.
>>
>> Q: What do Michael and homework have in common?
>> A: Both are a pain in the ass to kids
>>
>> The Pope has issued a proclamation on Michael Jackson:
>> If he hears any more allegations about little boys, the Pope says
>> he'll
>> have no choice but to make him a priest.
>>
>> Michael Jackson and his wife are in the recovery room with their new
>> baby
>> son.
>> The doctor walks in and Michael asks, "Doctor, how long before we can
>> have
>> sex?"
>> "I'd wait until he's at least 14," the doctor replies.
>>
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Wow...those are hilarious...sick but still hilarious.
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Dig me...But don't...Bury me I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Man With Hat
Collaborator
Jazz-Rock/Fusion/Canterbury Team
Joined: March 12 2005
Location: Neurotica
Status: Offline
Points: 166183
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Posted: August 05 2005 at 18:57 |
This was really close to going to the second page.
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Dig me...But don't...Bury me I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: March 23 2005
Location: Caerdydd
Status: Offline
Points: 32995
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Posted: August 05 2005 at 19:07 |
Second page of what?
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Man With Hat
Collaborator
Jazz-Rock/Fusion/Canterbury Team
Joined: March 12 2005
Location: Neurotica
Status: Offline
Points: 166183
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Posted: August 05 2005 at 19:11 |
Second page in the "discussions not related to music" part of the forum.
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Dig me...But don't...Bury me I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: March 23 2005
Location: Caerdydd
Status: Offline
Points: 32995
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Posted: August 05 2005 at 19:15 |
Oh I see. Well it's been rescued now! I would never abandon my baby!!!
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Man With Hat
Collaborator
Jazz-Rock/Fusion/Canterbury Team
Joined: March 12 2005
Location: Neurotica
Status: Offline
Points: 166183
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Posted: August 05 2005 at 20:02 |
Youd make a good mommy
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Dig me...But don't...Bury me I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Cygnus X-2
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: December 24 2004
Location: Bucketheadland
Status: Offline
Points: 21342
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Posted: August 05 2005 at 20:03 |
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Man With Hat
Collaborator
Jazz-Rock/Fusion/Canterbury Team
Joined: March 12 2005
Location: Neurotica
Status: Offline
Points: 166183
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Posted: August 05 2005 at 20:31 |
Yeah, but i think this thread has a good sense of humor (cept for stonie's posts )
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Dig me...But don't...Bury me I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Cygnus X-2
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: December 24 2004
Location: Bucketheadland
Status: Offline
Points: 21342
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Posted: August 05 2005 at 20:33 |
Man With Hat wrote:
Yeah, but i think this thread has a good sense of humor (cept for stonie's posts ) |
He and his tasteless and trite posts reveal the decline of mankind as we know it!
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Man With Hat
Collaborator
Jazz-Rock/Fusion/Canterbury Team
Joined: March 12 2005
Location: Neurotica
Status: Offline
Points: 166183
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Posted: August 05 2005 at 20:40 |
The world will end...and it's all stonie's fault
Good going
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Dig me...But don't...Bury me I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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