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gdub411 View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 30 2005 at 17:32
Originally posted by Trotsky Trotsky wrote:

My favourite is still here a few months after I pointed it out ... so I'm guessing this one stays?

 

ZAUBER Aliens
Review (Permanent link) by Kathleen Zien @ 2:42:30 PM EST, 10/28/2004

5 stars  —  This album was totally unrealistic, yet remarkably solid. As a person who has been through an Alien Abduction, I can attest that the Aliens in the songs were right on par. I relived the experience stereophonically. Real aliens make you drink mind bacteria that takes over your brain. This album will take over your brain. I think the singer was appropriate, but the composition of the album was what was amazing.

Kathleen Zien Ohio

This was perhaps the most entertaining review I ever read. Too bad it was so short. C'mon Kathleen...write more!!

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 30 2005 at 18:08
Originally posted by Certif1ed Certif1ed wrote:

Originally posted by Arbiter Arbiter wrote:

Love this one:

RUSH Rush - In Rio
Review by Ian Gledhill @ 2:15:05 PM EST, 2/14/2004

PROG REVIEWER
1 stars  —  This is one repeatedly overated band who, along with the likes of the rolling stones should have packed it in years ago. The last time I listened to this band was when I was in high school. For eggheads only.

I guess I'm an egghead!

This review does not meet the ProgArchive guidelines, which clearly state that a review should be 50 words or more. This clocks in at a mere 40...

Who are you calling pedantic?

YEAH- AND MY REVIEWS GET DELETED- AND THEY ARE NOT NEGATIVE AT ALL

PISSES ME OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHOEVER IS RUNNING THIS SITE NEEDS TO BE FIRED

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 30 2005 at 18:26
Genesis - Genesis Live album review and track listing GENESIS - Genesis Live
Review (Permanent link) by Ian Gledhill @ 2:46:19 PM EST, 4/30/2004
PROG REVIEWER
1 stars  —   .
Heres another one from Ian, apparently hes lost for words or speechless......
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 30 2005 at 18:52

Ian's reviews you all mentioned were written before the website's guidelines were there! Please think of that! He has written good ones as well!

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 30 2005 at 18:54
You are right he has written good ones.....
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2005 at 17:29

Here's a review I came across when I filed my review of TAPROBAN's "Outside Nowhere", and that struck me as a very well-written review.

 

TAPROBAN Outside Nowhere
Review (Permanent link) by klingonian @ 12:05:03 AM EST, 2/25/2005

4 stars  —  Outside Nowhere, the second CD from Italian trio Taproban, is an enthusiastically executed set of songs on a general theme of space exploration with some of the tracks paying homage to specific Science Fiction films (2001, Bladerunner and Star Trek). This is not a staggeringly original idea, nor does the music present anything particularly groundbreaking or revolutionary, but the core trio of Gianlucca De Rossi – keyboards and vocals, Guglielmo Mariotti – bass, vocals and acoustic guitar, and Davide Guidoni - percussion are all fine musicians, as is guest Alessandro Papotto (from the superb Periferia Del Mondo) on saxophone. Also, they look for inspiration in all the right places, with ELP, Yes, Rick Wakeman, Vangelis and Rush being the main, but by no means the only, influences. The pieces are largely instrumental, but the vocals, when they do occur, are pleasant enough, particularly on Broken Shell (an acoustic ballad) and Pieces Left Behind with the merest trace of an accent failing to dampen proceedings. I still prefer it where, as on Nexus, the vocals are presented in their native Italian. From the opening Wakeman-esque synth fanfare of At The Fifteenth Orbit, through the dynamic Chris Squire-like bass which powers the album’s centrepiece 19 minute suite Outside Nowhere and that same track’s bolero–like opening, melodic dancing sax solo, Peart-like percussion and lush layers of keyboards, to the spooky desolation conjured by the short but effective The Deep, this album is an enjoyable ride through an ever-changing landscape of prog rock staples and tried and tested styles. That said, they never stoop to blatant plagiarism and manage to pull all their influences into a cohesive whole. Of course, like ELP and Rick Wakeman, this is keyboard-dominated music, and is most likely to appeal to fans of these and similar artists. Di Rossi is a very capable player, with a wide range of styles at his command, from gentle piano to majestic organ, enabling him to conjure up appropriate atmospheres for this evocative music. The rhythm section are also considerable better than in many similar groups, where the backing is purely workmanlike. Il Dificile Equilibrio… has a more modern, spiralling synth sound, edging towards Ozric Tentacles in places but retaining a neo IQ inspired feel, mixed with some frantic ELP organ runs. The unpronounceable fifth track is apparently a Klingon translation of “War Dance” and this is an apt title for this lively Star Trek motivated piece, laced through with vibrant percussion, making for an easily likeable track. The album closes with the Bladerunner inspired Nexus featuring lovely, mournful saxophone, treated vocals and it ends with a sweet, melancholic piano mixed with samples of the last words of Russian cosmonaut Vladimir Komarov who died aboard the Sojuz 1. This is a reflective way to end an album whose moods are many and varied. While this is unlikely to top anyone’s “best of year” lists, it is a pleasing work with much to offer the old school prog fan. It manages to steer clear of the bombastic overkill employed by Japanese proponents of similar music (Ars Nova, Gerard) and also avoids the overt metal influences that are currently in vogue with many Neo-Prog groups (Star One, Aryeon). All in all, this is an agreeable album for all fans of keyboard prog


 

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Publius View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2005 at 19:20
Originally posted by Drew Drew wrote:

YEAH- AND MY REVIEWS GET DELETED- AND THEY ARE NOT NEGATIVE AT ALL

PISSES ME OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHOEVER IS RUNNING THIS SITE NEEDS TO BE FIRED

I can see why...Calm down mate...

I'm so prog, I clap in 9/8
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2005 at 21:11
Originally posted by Arbiter Arbiter wrote:

Love this one:

RUSH Rush - In Rio
Review by Ian Gledhill @ 2:15:05 PM EST, 2/14/2004

PROG REVIEWER
1 stars  —  This is one repeatedly overated band who, along with the likes of the rolling stones should have packed it in years ago. The last time I listened to this band was when I was in high school. For eggheads only.

I guess I'm an egghead!




Count me a full-fledged omelet covered in scrambled with a sunnyside fried on top.


Edited by Gedhead
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2005 at 22:37
Originally posted by NetsNJFan NetsNJFan wrote:

Originally posted by James Lee James Lee wrote:

PINK FLOYD - Ummagumma
Review by Armchair Jock @ 1:22:41 PM EST, 9/13/2004
0 stars  —   I listened to this album (yes, I said album) many times in the early 1970s. Without the mind-blowing 500 - 700 mics of orange barrel acid, this album would have been as "boring" and "non-sensical" as it really is. This album - like most of Pink Floyd's early stuff - has no place in a sane world...
 
 
On the other hand, fire away at this one.

I happen to agree, but it gets at least 1 star for Grantchester Meadows....

IMO, "Ummagumma" is a GREAT album ! Who needs acid when you got this ?

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2005 at 23:12
YES Close to the Edge progressive rock album and reviews YES - Close to the Edge (1972)
Review (Permanent link) by Kevin @ 8:16:18 PM EST, 7/31/2005
2 stars  —   OK- I bet this review will get deleted- but hee it goes- I have been trying to listen to this album over and over- trying to grasp the 'essential' qualty that this site proclaims. And after 12 or so listens, i fid nothing more than a medi-orce album. The 1st and title track, "Close to the Edge" is supposed to be the masterpiece- but I find the 1st few minutes nauseating- and very messy. When the vocals start, the song gets bette- but I find the lyrics repetitive and uninspiring. The rest of the album shows some moments- but I feel you have to be a yes fan to enjoy this album- hence the 2 star rating, collectors, fans only.
 
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stonebeard View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2005 at 23:22

you just got that off the front page, didn't you FC!

Lazyface!

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2005 at 23:45

It's important to note that this thread was started by an American (USA, as opposed to the many other countries in the Western hemisphere), and Americans are unique in taking for granted the fact that English is the international language. We are very lucky in this regard, and shouldn't taunt others for being so kind as to communicate in our language.

If, in contrast, we Americans had to write all our reviews in Spanish or Russian or Farsi, I think our writing would be equally flawed and less eloquent.

Food for thought...

"Progressive rock is the key to the continuance of human evolution." - Charles Darwin
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 01 2005 at 00:01
Originally posted by kirklott kirklott wrote:

It's important to note that this thread was started by an American (USA, as opposed to the many other countries in the Western hemisphere), and Americans are unique in taking for granted the fact that English is the international language. We are very lucky in this regard, and shouldn't taunt others for being so kind as to communicate in our language.

If, in contrast, we Americans had to write all our reviews in Spanish or Russian or Farsi, I think our writing would be equally flawed and less eloquent.

Food for thought...

that doesn't make it any less funny

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 01 2005 at 07:45
Originally posted by stonebeard stonebeard wrote:

you just got that off the front page, didn't you FC!

Lazyface!

Yes

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 01 2005 at 08:57

i dont quite understand Andrea´s reviews.....

 

i suck.

We want... a shrubbery!
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 01 2005 at 11:41

Apologies to the author who shall remain nameless, but I have to mention this review of Ummagumma

Essential: a masterpiece of progressive Rock music. This album "Ummagumma" became the first 2 piece set album for PINK FLOYD. The space with heat and terrible has been born in the live recording. The studio work can learn an experimental desire and the appearance in which it tries and errs.

I just love that third sentence - "the space with heat and terrible".

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 01 2005 at 12:46
check out this very confusing review...

YAK Dark Side Of The Duck progressive rock album and reviews YAK - Dark Side Of The Duck (2004)
Review (Permanent link) by Harvey S. Beeswanger @ 12:43:34 PM EST, 8/1/2005
4 stars  —   In the course of my scholarly duties at the University of Bratislava (formerly Minsk College of Nugatory Arts), I was given a free copy of a CD called DARK SIDE OF THE DUCK by YAK and what a revelation it turned out to be! The inner section, round and silver, although at first a trivial plaything, has now found a permanent home between my ice box and the mangle, creating better dampcoursing and more plastic. The pictures and wording inside have proved of enormous benefit covering up one or other of my exhausts during difficult bathtimes.

For the technical among us, I have identified a retroflexive hinge on the dorsal flange and have stress-tested same.

ONLY FOUR STARS because my copy had a hole in it.

I would, however, like to praise Messrs Hodder, Wynn, Morgan and Snell for their photograph, which is a thing of beauty, though misunderstood by Mrs. Beeswanger.

Now for a feast!!!

Harvey S. Beeswanger (dec'd)
The Worthless Recluse
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 01 2005 at 12:53
Originally posted by James Lee James Lee wrote:

How about a thread of some of the more unique contributions to the reviews? While I don't necessarily want to single people out for ridicule, I think some really fascinatingly mystifying points of view have been submitted. Humor (intentional or unintentional), bizarre observations, or just plain missing the point entirely would be good criteria. Even some of the more warped web-translations would work (I, for one, have come to look forward to andrea salvador's submissions).

Here's some recent examples to get us started:

YES - Fragile
Review by penguindf12 @ 6:01:53 PM EST, 8/11/2004

4 stars  —   Great album. Excellent. But it's just not Pink Floyd. It would be a five-star in my opinion if I could find out the concept of it or the theme here. I assume it has one? Maybe I'm just nieve, but I can't figure out the lyrical meaning behind the excellent music. If someone could point me to the purpose of the album, please do.
 
YES - Fragile
Review by andrea salvador @ 8:32:32 AM EST, 8/11/2004
5 stars  —   To say it is a perfect album is to say null! The masterpiece of true Yes! One of the album more influential than all the rock! Perfect in all, from the first one to last second of music, with the musicians who exceed themselves and sound and one recording truly perfect! That other to say... If you did not know that it exists, I would not believe to us... This is music... This are Yes!

Defo a crack but be nice to peeps who perhaps are using English as their 2nd or 3rd language eh?

I can't remember what I said
I lost my head.

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 01 2005 at 12:55
Originally posted by Gatot Gatot wrote:

Originally posted by Miaugion Miaugion wrote:

 
GENESIS We Can't Dance  progressive rock album and reviews GENESIS - We Can't Dance
Review by özalan @ 11:23:01 AM EST, 11/24/2004
5 stars  —   well i was telled that genesis is great band from english so i decided to be buy "selling england by the bound". it was horible, too long songs, whine wocalist, whad?!?!: medieval and folk müzik putted there and no god chorus!!! or modulation in end of songs! it was crap! butt then i heard from radio istanbul "jesus he knows me" - of course it was dubbed here in islam to "allah he knows me" butt i was realy astonishments. it was cool! grate 80's sound, catch chorus and great drum machine drummings. and also wery gay vocals by phil collins. i like!!!
 

TongueTongueTongue

 

 

Is that for real!?........that's a f*cking classic! - post it on the front page!

I can't remember what I said
I lost my head.

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 01 2005 at 12:58

"Harvey S. Beeswanger (dec'd)"

Wow! The first review ProgArchives has had from the afterlife.

 

 

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