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Prog_Bassist View Drop Down
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Direct Link To This Post Topic: I知 still working on lyrics...
    Posted: April 12 2005 at 01:11
Yeah, I'm still honing my skills on lyrics...

Here's the latest one that I think is somewhat good enough to hear your opinions.

OBSERVATION: A)THE DYING WORLD B)THE SILENT FALL C)THE ENIGMA/REPRISAL D)WE WILL FIGHT
(B.Waye)

Figure a:

Lesser god extends hand
Penetrating youth
Shadows of war
Overcome the bright side
things to come
Things to lose
Impending on creator

Constellations glowing
Meditating on thoughts
Ideas unthought by us
Unknown to us
Contemplating
Fates intertwining
Spiralling into each other
Like the fountains of an ancient temple
Spouting forth pure life
From something as dead as years past

Hand that feeds pulls away
Piercing trust
Clouds of rain
Thunder flash of a thousand beams of light
Wielding the banner
For red march of nations
This is the Silent Fall.

Figure b:

There's an emptyness in your eyes
A hollowness in those darkened stains
I can see the echoes of a thousand labours
Frozen in the state of present tense
The tension between us
Like two reactors
Feeding from each other
In those hungry eyes

Silent Fall
Nameless
Quiet
Calm
Do we know what's coming?

Visage of god?
Wrath of effortless paw?
Ever-flowing water disturbed?

Rippling towards the rim
Spilling over
Over the edge

Silent Fall
Nameless
Quiet
Calm
Do we know what's coming?

Hand that disturbs
Life that spouts from the crack
On surface of man.

Figure c:

Lesser god extends hand
Hand that feeds pulls away.

Figure d:

We will live
The way that we want to live

We will breathe
The way that we want to breathe

We will learn
The way that we want to learn

We will fight
The way that we want to fight

END

So whataya think? Did I get any better at all?

Edited by Prog_Bassist
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 01:17
Very... proggy.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 01:32
is that.....bad?
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 02:17
Well I'm not sure relevance this post serves in this forum. We need like a "Musicians Forum" that is seperate from "Musical Instruments".

Regardless, I think your lyrics were quite fine, it evoked a lot of interesting imagery which I hope you will reflect in your music (this being the essence of prog.)

Right on
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 15:13


Yeah, I'm not sure what forum to put these things in...I just need opinions, badly.


oh, and bumperoo.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 15:45
sounds a little to Jon Andersony - and isn't Silent Spring a Yes song?
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 16:10
it's silent fall....


it was silent spring at first actually, but it was before I even heard of the yes song. Then I noticed it, and changed it to fall. lol.

but I forgot to change that one line...
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 16:11
ha ha ok -  they aren't bad though
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 16:23
Originally posted by NetsNJFan NetsNJFan wrote:

sounds a little to Jon Andersony - and isn't Silent Spring a Yes song?


Silent Spring is a book about insecticides.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 16:31
It's also a lyric in a Genesis song on Trespass
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 20:04

Very good, very progessive, alot of imagery and meaning to the lyrics (at least how i interpertted them

Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 20:32
bitch
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 21:29
Originally posted by Hierophant Hierophant wrote:


Originally posted by NetsNJFan NetsNJFan wrote:

sounds a little to Jon Andersony - and
isn't Silent Spring a Yes song?


Silent Spring is a book about insecticides.

Thanks for a good laugh!!! You're right. Is it Rachel
Carlson? Still laughing.
Interesting lyrics. I like the imagery. I know it's a
concept piece, but I'm a little dense, could you tell the
story, progbassist?
Wearing feelings on our faces when our faces took a rest...
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 12 2005 at 21:59
Well, it's actually about a couple of subjects.

it's kinda hard to explain, but it is, overall, about how we think we are the highest beings on this planet, how we start wars for basically no reason except for gaining more useless land (lesser god extends hand, penetrating youth, shadows of war), and that there could be higher powers at work, that we could never even dream of.

I dunno, how to exactly give a good explanation, but I guess that's as good as I can do. :P
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 13 2005 at 00:12
I have to agree with the Jon Anderson statement... all your missing is the word Grace!
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 13 2005 at 00:28

Originally posted by Prog_Bassist Prog_Bassist wrote:

Well, it's actually about a couple of subjects.

it's kinda hard to explain, but it is, overall, about how we think we are the highest beings on this planet, how we start wars for basically no reason except for gaining more useless land (lesser god extends hand, penetrating youth, shadows of war), and that there could be higher powers at work, that we could never even dream of.

I dunno, how to exactly give a good explanation, but I guess that's as good as I can do. :P

*cough* As I said... very proggy.

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Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 13 2005 at 04:11
I can't read lyrics unless I have the music to go with it.
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