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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Topic: cheesy jokes part 2... Posted: August 11 2006 at 14:08 |
My dog's called Minton & the other day i saw him eating a load of shuttlecocks!! Badminton!!!!
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 26 2006 at 14:34 |
once you've seen one you've seen em all!!
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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Vompatti
Forum Senior Member
VIP Member
Joined: October 22 2005
Location: elsewhere
Status: Offline
Points: 67407
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Posted: June 26 2006 at 14:31 |
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 26 2006 at 13:54 |
A lady puts her 2 twins up for adoption.A family from Spain have one & calls him Juan. The other family are from Egypt & call him Ahmal. A few years later she gets a photo sent from Juan. "I wish i could see what Ahmal looks like as well!" Her husband says"They're twins,once you've seen Juan you've seen Ahmal!!"
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 21 2006 at 14:39 |
What's black & white & eats like a horse??
A Zebra!
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 19 2006 at 15:20 |
I saw a slug selling the Big Issue the other day..........
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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Australian
Prog Reviewer
Joined: June 13 2006
Location: Australia
Status: Offline
Points: 3278
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Posted: June 18 2006 at 04:56 |
A blonde goes looking for Crocodile skin shoes. She stands in the water, shoots a crocodile and bends down to look at the feet then she says "damn this one wasn't wearing shoes either."
Edited by Australian - June 18 2006 at 05:01
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Australian
Prog Reviewer
Joined: June 13 2006
Location: Australia
Status: Offline
Points: 3278
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Posted: June 18 2006 at 04:52 |
Michael Jackson is flying over the pacific with a group of children when the plane starts to fall, the pilot says to him "let’s go, quickly" Michele replies
"What about the kids"
The Pilots says "Screw the kids"
Michele replies "Do we have Time?"
My year 8 teacher told me that one.
Edited by Australian - June 18 2006 at 04:53
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Flyingsod
Forum Senior Member
Joined: March 19 2006
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 564
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Posted: June 17 2006 at 23:45 |
Spirits heh. I'll add that one to the list.
What's the difference betwen a fox and a woman jogger?
ones a cunning runt.
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 17 2006 at 18:23 |
A ghost walks into a pub and says "i'd like a glass of whisky please" The barman says "sorry i don't serve spirits in here!"
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 14 2006 at 13:23 |
2 cannibal's eating an indian meal & one says to the other "my nan's tough!" the other cannibal says " i should think so,she was 85 years old!"
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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Camel_APPeal
Forum Senior Member
Joined: April 22 2006
Location: Mexico
Status: Offline
Points: 428
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Posted: June 14 2006 at 12:01 |
arnold stirrup wrote:
A guy goes to the doctor and the doctors examines him and says, "I'm sorry to tell you this, but you've got Tom Jones disease". The guy says, "Tom Jones disease? I've never heard of it. Is it rare?" The doc says, "It's not unusual".
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That one reminded me this one:
A guy goes to the doctor and the doctor examines him and says, "I'm afraid you've got the Wilkinson desease...". The guy says: "Oh my...how bad is that?"
The doctor says: "We don't know yet, Mr. Wilkinson"
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 13 2006 at 14:48 |
Two fish in a tank,one says to the other " how do you drive this thing?"
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 13 2006 at 14:46 |
Two budgies sitting on a perch.....one says "can you smell fish?"
Think about it!
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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Publius84
Forum Senior Member
Joined: November 11 2005
Location: Poland
Status: Offline
Points: 1043
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Posted: June 07 2006 at 04:02 |
A blonde comes to doctor with a frog on her head. Doctor ask: "What seem to be the problem, miss?". And frog answer: "Something sticked to my ass"
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I know what I like and I like what I know...
Prog is in my heart, in my mind, in my soul...
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 06 2006 at 17:26 |
What's got three legs & used to live on a farm??
The McCartney's
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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Tiresias
Forum Senior Member
Joined: July 03 2005
Status: Offline
Points: 560
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Posted: June 03 2006 at 10:31 |
/\ nice
Q: What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a half a worm inside of it?
A: The Holocaust.
Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive?
A: Because she's a woman!
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Wh'ghal ng'fth mglw'y Ry'leh, Cthulhu fhtagn...
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arnold stirrup
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 28 2006
Status: Offline
Points: 188
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Posted: June 03 2006 at 10:16 |
A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Where's the bartender?"
A guy goes to the doctor and the doctors examines him and says, "I'm
sorry to tell you this, but you've got Tom Jones disease". The
guy says, "Tom Jones disease? I've never heard of it. Is it rare?"
The doc says, "It's not unusual".
A guy calls his wife on the phone and says, "Honey, I'm at the
hospital. I was in a terrible accident at work, and I cut off my
finger!" The wife screams, "Oh my God, the whole finger?!?!" The
guy says, "No, the one next to it."
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So much music. So little time.
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daz2112
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 18 2006
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 4483
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Posted: June 02 2006 at 19:26 |
What do you call a scotsman at the world cup?
The referee!!
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In the constellation of cygnus,There lurks a mysterious force...The black hole
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sbrushfan
Forum Senior Member
Joined: November 07 2005
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 1177
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Posted: June 01 2006 at 02:40 |
What's the difference between a nun in a convent and a blonde in a bathtub?
The nun has hope in her soul.
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Some world views are spacious, and some are merely spaced...
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