Your residents theory

I tink I had another favorite band  no matter for what planet they came for.

I think they're aliens controlled by the grand cosmik machine located in the center of cygnus X-1 controlled by the walrus slaves of the illuminati.

The Residents were embedded informants in California hippy communes in the 60s and now they're in the government's witness protection program.





























well, it's a theory.

they are actually the Beatles in disguise...John Lennon and George Harrison faked their deaths to complete the illusion, and Ringo and Paul didn't to...um...complete the illusion further! also, the 'real' Paul and Ringo are actually fake. there was just that much more money in Residential music.

The Residents are two men and two women, two couples...

...they are ABBA in disguise. ABBA started in 1973, the same year as The Residents. ABBA's last LP iis entitled "The Visitors", a notion that easily can be associated with "Residents"...

...or maybe not. This theory is perhaps more absurd than all the other Residents theories.

BaldFriede wrote: (King Crimson mention one war on their album "Lizard"; "The Battle of the Glass Tears" is a famous battle in history, in which our side won).

 I wonder how huge the tears would have been...

But... Wait! They don't have tear glands! They can't cry!

They are aliens from the same planet as Jean and I. There are two sentient races on this planet: One is completely hairless, but else look exactly like human beings, the other has eyeballs for heads. The one with the skull had an accident, in which his eyeball burst, leaving only the skull beneath. The two races co-exist in peace meanwhile, but there is a long and dark history of wars between them. (King Crimson mention one war on their album "Lizard"; "The Battle of the Glass Tears" is a famous battle in history, in which our side won).

I actually met a Resident once (maybe). True story:

I grew up in San Mateo, California, the Residents adopted hometown, so listening to The Residents was always a matter of civic pride. Sometime in the late '70s my buddy Todd and I (the Prog Rock art nerds of our graduating class in high school) made a pilgrimage to 444 Grove Street in San Francisco, an otherwise unassuming building underneath the Central Freeway (I think the freeway has since been demolished, and probably the building too, in the gentrification of The City, but that was long after I left California).

Anyway, while we were standing around outside, shifting our feet and twiddling our thumbs and wondering what to do, a guy walks up with a key and unlocks the door. We talk for a minute. Yes, he says, this is where The Residents record their stuff. He had a slightly nasal southern accent but there was nothing else remotely remarkable about him.

That's the entire story. But could it be...?

I saw The Residents live in 1986 (on ther 13th anniversary tour). The guitarist Snakefinger was a special guest-star. He was the only one on stage who wasn't masked. I was surprised to find that two of the four Residents members appeared to be women.

i think Primus was the Residents for a while