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AtomicCrimsonRush 
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 Topic: Know any quick jokes?
Posted: November 20 2011 at 00:43 |
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BWAHAHAHAHAH
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presdoug
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 24 2010
Location: Canada
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Points: 8672
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Posted: November 19 2011 at 20:55 |
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^There! That joke was so quick you didn't even see it!
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Luna
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Joined: July 28 2010
Location: Funky Town
Status: Offline
Points: 12794
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Posted: November 19 2011 at 18:17 |
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What has 2 legs and bleeds?
Half a dog
What's invisible and red?
No tomatoes
Edited by SolarLuna96 - November 19 2011 at 18:19
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Andy Webb
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Retired Admin
Joined: June 04 2010
Location: Terria
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Points: 13298
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Posted: November 19 2011 at 18:14 |
 Horizons wrote:
Andyman1125 wrote:
Q: What happens when a piano falls down a mine shaft?A: A♭ minor |
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Edited by Andyman1125 - November 19 2011 at 18:16
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Horizons
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Posted: November 19 2011 at 13:40 |
Andyman1125 wrote:
Q: What happens when a piano falls down a mine shaft?A: A♭ minor |
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Crushed like a rose in the riverflow.
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presdoug
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Joined: January 24 2010
Location: Canada
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Points: 8672
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Posted: November 19 2011 at 12:48 |
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What did the Hearing Specialist say to his patients during the Holiday Season?
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Ear!
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irrelevant
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Posted: November 18 2011 at 09:38 |
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George Bush.
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AtomicCrimsonRush
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Posted: November 18 2011 at 09:08 |
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no
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presdoug
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 24 2010
Location: Canada
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Points: 8672
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Posted: November 15 2011 at 13:11 |
I have trouble with fractions about 4 out of 3 times a day 
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Andy Webb
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Retired Admin
Joined: June 04 2010
Location: Terria
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Posted: October 02 2011 at 16:46 |
Q: What happens when a piano falls down a mine shaft? A: A♭ minor
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colorofmoney91
Prog Reviewer
Joined: March 16 2008
Location: Biosphere
Status: Offline
Points: 22774
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Posted: October 02 2011 at 10:14 |
Q: What's really brown and sticky? A: A stick.
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Earendil
Forum Senior Member
Joined: November 17 2008
Location: Indiana, USA
Status: Offline
Points: 1584
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Posted: August 14 2011 at 22:32 |
That last one was clever.
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AtomicCrimsonRush
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Joined: July 02 2008
Location: Australia
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Posted: August 14 2011 at 22:12 |
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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f".. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vordskontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
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The Truth
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Posted: August 01 2011 at 11:41 |
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Here's one:
1
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Luna
Forum Senior Member
Joined: July 28 2010
Location: Funky Town
Status: Offline
Points: 12794
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Posted: August 01 2011 at 11:31 |
Andyman1125 wrote:
Sheavy wrote:
Falx wrote:
Spotted on Miss Cellania's blog today...
Grammar is important. Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse, and helping your uncle jack off a horse.
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Similar one: "Let's eat, Gramma!" and "Let's eat Gramma!" Grammer. It saves Lives. |
GRAMMAR
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presdoug
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 24 2010
Location: Canada
Status: Offline
Points: 8672
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Posted: August 01 2011 at 10:42 |
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what do you get when you drop a Grand Piano down a mine shaft?
A flat minor
You know what they say about Hitler?
the fewer the better
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AtomicCrimsonRush
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Joined: July 02 2008
Location: Australia
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Points: 14258
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Posted: August 01 2011 at 05:31 |
groaners here
another...
knock knock
whos there
centipede
centipede who
'Santa peed' down the chimney
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Andy Webb
Special Collaborator
Retired Admin
Joined: June 04 2010
Location: Terria
Status: Offline
Points: 13298
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Posted: July 31 2011 at 17:18 |
moreitsythanyou wrote:
What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer?
"We are both lawyers."
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that's awesome
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presdoug
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 24 2010
Location: Canada
Status: Offline
Points: 8672
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Posted: July 31 2011 at 17:00 |
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"You know, i have a joke that's so quick tha-"
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presdoug
Forum Senior Member
Joined: January 24 2010
Location: Canada
Status: Offline
Points: 8672
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Posted: July 31 2011 at 16:54 |
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How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change.
How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?
IT DOESN'T MATTER!!
What was the name of the communist Beatle's fan?
John Lenin
Did you hear about the hooker that joined the military?
She assumed a new position.
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Know any quick jokes?
