Best/funniest quotes from musicians - Progressive Rock Music Forum

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kimmokristian84 View Drop Down

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Topic: Best/funniest quotes from musicians
Posted: January 07 2013 at 13:55

One of my favorites of the funny ones is Frank Zappa`s "Jazz is not dead, it just smells funny."

Dayvenkirq View Drop Down

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 14:35

The ones that have been in my sig:

"It has nothing to do with metronome, it has nothing to do with playing on the click. We just ... our heart, our emotion was the timing, you know, and ... beautiful."

- Daniel Fichelscher, Popol Vuh.

"You prefer to work slowly to let it come to you. If you force it, it always shows. When you are filling your stuff up, you know, and you certainly gotta be patient." - Scott Walker on music-making.

"Composing itself, in a way, is a simplifying process, just trying to pick some (strands?) out [of] the clamour in the head."

- Robert Wyatt.

================================================================

No funny ones that I can remember as of now. Stay tuned for more updates/edits.

Edited by Dayvenkirq - January 07 2013 at 14:39

lucas

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 14:52

my signature ?

"Magma was the very first gothic rock band" (Didier Lockwood)

HolyMoly

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 16:44

Here's one from a musician friend of mine, that's stuck with me over the years.

"It's just rock and roll, man. Nobody cares."

- My friend Rich.

My other avatar is a Porsche

It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased.

-Kehlog Albran

Sumdeus

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 17:44

Jerry Garcia:
"I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves"

Jimi Hendrix:
"Blues is easy to play, but hard to feel"

Thelonious Monk:
"I say, play your own way. Don’t play what the public wants. You play what you want and let the public pick up on what you’re doing? even if it does take them fifteen, twenty years."

Frank Zappa:
"Most rock journalism is people who can't write, interviewing people who can't talk, for people who can't read"

Eyedea:
"I'm working for bread crumbs, pretending there's a meaning
But my employment is just a bucket that I'm desperately beating
And one day, I'll be old and retired
Looking at my life like what a waste of good fire
All because school never taught me how to be inspired
And the job concerned with finding myself just wouldn't hire"

that one is lyrics from an actual song but one of my favorite parts. really powerful ending to his last verse on the song, the tune was about Eyedea meeting a bum beating a bucket for change on the street and when he starts asking the bum why he doesn't to anything more important and the bum replies that they he accomplishes just as much as anyone else, he just stopped pretending that his job matters.

Edited by Sumdeus - January 07 2013 at 17:45

Sumdeus - surreal space/psych/prog journeys

Dayvenkirq View Drop Down

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 18:01

^ Great post, man. I was never quite fond of, and I am still not fond of, committing myself 100% to what I want to play regardless of what the public wants to hear, though I really want to believe in what Thelonious said.

Edited by Dayvenkirq - January 07 2013 at 18:01

HolyMoly

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 18:08

I wonder if Thelonius said that before or after people started liking him.

My other avatar is a Porsche

It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased.

-Kehlog Albran

HolyMoly

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 18:09

"Don't buy beer with change, man. It changes you."

-- Bob Dylan, to a friend of a friend of mine, in a convenience store

My other avatar is a Porsche

It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased.

-Kehlog Albran

Sumdeus

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 18:10

Dayvenkirq wrote:

^ Great post, man. I was never quite fond of, and I am still not fond of, committing myself 100% to what I want to play regardless of what the public wants to hear, though I really want to believe in what Thelonious said.

yeah i get you. I've always felt, after reading that quote, that a true artist owes it to themselves to do that and be uncompromising in their artistic vision but the real issue is that artists are still humans with human needs, and more often than not being uncompromising in your vision leads to problems when it comes to having food to eat and a place to stay, as well as all the other fun stuff artists love to do that requires money :P I like to think that since it is Thelonious who said this that there must be some truth to it though.

edit: interesting point^... I'm gonna see if i can find out when exactly that quote is from

Edited by Sumdeus - January 07 2013 at 18:11

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zappaholic View Drop Down

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 19:10

kimmokristian84 wrote:

One of my favorites of the funny ones is Frank Zappa`s "Jazz is not dead, it just smells funny."

My favorite Zappa quote (because it also applies to me):

"I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird."

"Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard." -- H.L. Mencken

zeqexes

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 19:43

"I have a philosophy: More is more, less is less. The idea that less is more is illogical." - Yngwie Malmsteen

zeqexes

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 19:44

This one also:

"Do you like Israeli music?" (Interviewer)

"No. 99 percent of Israeli music is bad, 99 percent of British music is bad, 99.9 percent of American music is bad, 99 percent of music in general is bad. Full stop. Israel is no different; most of the music is crap, like everywhere else in the world." - Steven Wilson

Edited by zeqexes - January 07 2013 at 19:44

Luna

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 20:33

zeqexes wrote:

This one also:

"Do you like Israeli music?" (Interviewer)

This is the most Steven Wilson quote I've seen. Though it it true, he said it in such a way that he seems like an ass. Of course, this is Steven Wilson...

The Dark Elf View Drop Down

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 21:03

"Yes, can we have everything louder than everything else?" -- Ian Gillan, from Deep Purple's Made in Japan

"I'd better not open this now because it might contain contraband. We'll give it to John to supplement his Camels. He was dropped on his head when he was very small. We occasionally cut his fingernails off and smoke them."
-- Ian Anderson, referring to John Evan in the live portion of Living in the Past

Guy In The Audience: "Whipping Post"!

FZ: Say that again please.

Guy In The Audience: "Whipping Post"!

FZ: "Whipping Post"? Ok, just a second . . . (Do you know that?) Oh sorry, we don't know that one. Anything else? Hum me a few bars of it, please. Just show me how it goes, please. Just sing, sing me "Whipping Post" and then maybe we'll play it with you.

Guy In The Audience: Ooh-ooh-ooh . . .

FZ: Thank you very much. And now . . . Judging from the way you sang it, it must be a John Cage composition, right? Here we go, "Montana." One two, one two three four...

I might be movin' to . . .

FZ: Hold it! Hold it! We can't possibly start the song off like that! Good God! That's inexcusable! What happened to you last night?

Napoleon: George has a tape of it.

FZ: George has a tape of it? Ok, we'll use that in the second show. Ready? "Montana" . . . Wait a minute, "Whipping Post," no, "Montana." One two, one two three four...

FZ: It's too fast for you? One two, one two three four...

I might be movin' to Helsinki soon
Just to raise me up a crop of
Dental Floss

Raisin' it up
Waxin' it down
Tying it to the Whipping Post
In the middle of town

But by myself I wouldn't
Have no boss,
'Cause I'd be raisin' my lonely
Whipping Post

Raisin' my lonely
Whipping Post
Raisin' my lonely
Whipping Post

-- Frank Zappa, excerpt from "Montana (Whipping Floss)" live from Helsinki on You Can't do that on Stage Anymore Sampler (1988)

...a vigorous circular motion hitherto unknown to the people of this area, but destined
to take the place of the mud shark in your mythology...

Finnforest View Drop Down

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 21:15

Pete Townshend calling Plant and Bonham "a couple of ernies from the Highlands."

I still remember that from reading his bio. LOL

...that moment you realize you like "Mob Rules" better than "Heaven and Hell"

Sumdeus

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 21:32

zeqexes wrote:

"I have a philosophy: More is more, less is less. The idea that less is more is illogical." - Yngwie Malmsteen

this explains a lot about his music.. it's a shame he never realized that sometimes less IS more haha

Sumdeus - surreal space/psych/prog journeys

timothy leary View Drop Down

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 22:03

"I tried out that Buckethead guy. I met with him and asked him to work with me, but only if he got rid of the f g bucket. So I came back a bit later, and he's wearing this green f g Martian's-hat thing! I said, 'Look, just be yourself.' He told me his name was Brian, so I said that's what I'd call him. He says, 'No one calls me Brian except my mother.' So I said, 'Pretend I'm your mum, then!' I haven't even got out of the room and I'm already playing f g mind games with the guy. What happens if one day he's gone and there's a note saying, 'I've been beamed up'? Don't get me wrong, he's a great player. He plays like a mo er."^[25]

Ozzy Osbourne, Revolver.

Dayvenkirq View Drop Down

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Posted: January 07 2013 at 22:09

The Dark Elf wrote:

"I'd better not open this now because it might contain contraband. We'll give it to John to supplement his Camels. He was dropped on his head when he was very small. We occasionally cut his fingernails off and smoke them."

-- Ian Anderson, referring to John Evan in the live portion of Living in the Past

I didn't get that one.

Edited by Dayvenkirq - January 08 2013 at 13:52

zravkapt

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Posted: January 08 2013 at 00:45

Lemmy on being asked what he would do if he met Elvis: "I would be astounded, and I would say 'Elvis, I'm astounded"

Magma America Great Make Again

Jim Garten View Drop Down

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Posted: January 08 2013 at 03:06

SolarLuna96 wrote:

zeqexes wrote:

This one also:

"Do you like Israeli music?" (Interviewer)

This is the most Steven Wilson quote I've seen. Though it it true, he said it in such a way that he seems like an ass. Of course, this is Steven Wilson...

Another gem from Steven Wilson (paraphrased via memory) from the Canterbury Festival 1999:

Audience member: Radioactive Toy!!

Steven Wilson: Look, the way it works is we have a set list & play it to you; there's no point in calling out for songs unless you've seen the set list, so shut the

up!

Jon Lord 1941 - 2012