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Jim Garten
Special Collaborator
Retired Admin & Razor Guru
Joined: February 02 2004
Location: South England
Status: Offline
Points: 14693
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Topic: You know youre living in 2004 when..... Posted: December 01 2004 at 03:48 |
I think this may have been posted before some time ago - if so, my apologies, but here goes anyway -
You know you're living in 2004 when....
1 You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2 You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3 You have a list of 16 phone numbers to reach your family of 4.
4 You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5 Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
6 When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.
7 When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial "9" to get an outside line.
8 You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.
10 You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock news.
11 Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job.
12 Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more likely to get long-service awards. AND...
13 You read this entire list, and kept nodding and smiling.
14 As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your "friends."
15 You got this email from a friend that never talks to you anymore, except to send you jokes from the net.
16 You are too busy to notice there was no number 9.
17 You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a number 9.
18 AND NOW you're laughing at yourself.
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Jon Lord 1941 - 2012
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Certif1ed
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: April 08 2004
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 7559
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 09:45 |
19. When someone cracks a joke, you say LOL, or ROTFL.
20. If your internet connection goes, there's a vacuum in your life and you start pacing around wondering what to do.
21. If your PC dies it's more like a black hole, and you start stalking around wondering who to kill.
22. You talk more to your PC than to people around you.
23. Your car knows more about what's wrong with it than you do.
24. Something rings and you can't tell if it's your watch, your phone, your camera or your PDA.
25. Something rings and you can't tell if it's your watch, phone, etc. or someone else's.
26. Something rings and you're now so numb to it that you no longer feel the natural urge to bludgeon the sodding thing with a large, blunt baseball bat.
27. The only thing you own that doesn't have a built-in digital clock is an old pair of pants.
28. Ths sntnce mks cmplte snse to yo dspte the almst cmplte absnse of vwls.
29. You look down pityingly on anyone that hasn't bought anything online.
30. You have a cupboard stuffed full of junk that you bought online as a whim...
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sigod
Forum Senior Member
Joined: September 17 2004
Location: London
Status: Offline
Points: 2779
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 10:10 |
All true. And I do indeed have a cupboard full of online junk.
Anybody want this?
Ebay eh? The things I buy.....
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I must remind the right honourable gentleman that a monologue is not a decision.
- Clement Atlee, on Winston Churchill
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Peter
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: January 31 2004
Location: Canada
Status: Offline
Points: 9669
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 10:40 |
^ Aaaarooooooo!
Well, that's one place to carry your morning grapefruit....
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"And, has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!' He chortled in his joy.
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Reed Lover
Forum Senior Member
Joined: July 16 2004
Location: Sao Tome and Pr
Status: Offline
Points: 5187
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 12:10 |
28. Ths sntnce mks cmplte snse to yo dspte the almst cmplte absnse of vwls.
On a serious note, apparently all literate English-Speaking (as a first language) people would be able to read the sentence. Apparently the brain has an autocomplete facility that allows it to read common words without consulting the vowels.
So tht sntnce mks cmplte snse!!
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Dan Bobrowski
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: February 02 2004
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 5243
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 14:06 |
You know it's 2020 when:
Jim Garten shuffles slowly into an ice cream parlor and painfully pulled himself up onto a stool.
After catching his breath he orders a banana split.
The waitress asks kindly, "Crushed nuts?"
No," Jim replies, "arthritis."
Edited by danbo
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Reed Lover
Forum Senior Member
Joined: July 16 2004
Location: Sao Tome and Pr
Status: Offline
Points: 5187
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 14:13 |
You know it is 2004 when
your local police officer spends all day playing on the computer at his desk.
Go and catch some criminals Dumbo!
Edited by Reed Lover
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Peter
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: January 31 2004
Location: Canada
Status: Offline
Points: 9669
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 14:22 |
^ Maybe he's catching internet prog offenders -- Dull-ass Cryin' seems to have been apprehended for his w**kery....
Edited by Peter
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"And, has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!' He chortled in his joy.
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Reed Lover
Forum Senior Member
Joined: July 16 2004
Location: Sao Tome and Pr
Status: Offline
Points: 5187
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 14:32 |
Peter wrote:
^ Maybe he's catching internet prog offenders -- Dull-ass Cryin' seems to have been apprehended for his w**kery.... |
I'll bet you your PO Box number he come's back.
I still dont think he is a noobie!
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Easy Livin
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator / Retired Admin
Joined: February 21 2004
Location: Scotland
Status: Offline
Points: 15585
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 14:44 |
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Reed Lover
Forum Senior Member
Joined: July 16 2004
Location: Sao Tome and Pr
Status: Offline
Points: 5187
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 15:30 |
Easy Livin wrote:
wht ld f bllxks
Cmprnd?
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whts a ld f bllcks ?
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Certif1ed
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: April 08 2004
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 7559
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 16:05 |
sigod wrote:
All true. And I do indeed have a cupboard full of online junk.
Anybody want this?
Ebay eh? The things I buy.....
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No thanks - I've already got one...
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Peter
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: January 31 2004
Location: Canada
Status: Offline
Points: 9669
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 16:39 |
Stop showing me that!
Again, I'm suddenly craving grapefruit, my vision is worsening, and my palms are cut up from razor nicks! Yowtch!
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"And, has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!' He chortled in his joy.
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gdub411
Forum Senior Member
Joined: August 24 2004
Location: United States
Status: Offline
Points: 3484
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 16:42 |
Peter wrote:
Stop showing me that!
Again, I'm suddenly craving grapefruit, my vision is worsening, and my palms are cut up from razor nicks! Yowtch!
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stop showing you what peter?
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Peter
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: January 31 2004
Location: Canada
Status: Offline
Points: 9669
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 16:43 |
Easy Livin wrote:
wht ld f bllxks
Cmprnd?
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! Stp swrng, Sleazy! Nd u splt bllcks wrng!
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"And, has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!' He chortled in his joy.
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Peter
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: January 31 2004
Location: Canada
Status: Offline
Points: 9669
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 16:48 |
gdub411 wrote:
Peter wrote:
Stop showing me that!
Again, I'm suddenly craving grapefruit, my vision is worsening, and my palms are cut up from razor nicks! Yowtch!
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stop showing you what peter?
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That shoddily-made sand fence, OBVIOUSLY, Fruit Cock-tail!
Such poor workmanship! Not BUILT well at all! Tsk Tsk!
Glorp!
Edited by Peter
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"And, has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!' He chortled in his joy.
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Easy Livin
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator / Retired Admin
Joined: February 21 2004
Location: Scotland
Status: Offline
Points: 15585
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 17:07 |
Peter wrote:
Easy Livin wrote:
wht ld f bllxks
Cmprnd?
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! Stp swrng, Sleazy! Nd u splt bllcks wrng!
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Jst shws u cn drp th vwls nd spll t wrng nd stll b ndrstd!
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Peter
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: January 31 2004
Location: Canada
Status: Offline
Points: 9669
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 17:32 |
Don't try it without the consonants, though, you big, balding Scottish wanker!
HA!
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"And, has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!' He chortled in his joy.
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Reed Lover
Forum Senior Member
Joined: July 16 2004
Location: Sao Tome and Pr
Status: Offline
Points: 5187
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Posted: December 01 2004 at 17:38 |
That wasnt nice Peter!
You big balding Canadian w**ker
OOps I think I did it wrong
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