The Shed

 

Wall-E is excellent, the best thing yet from Pixar IMO. I'd like to know what you think of it, Tony.

 

I quite like the revenge of the middle finger as I pass!!

 

Just finished what I hope will be the last grass cut of the year. All I need to do now is prepare the mower for its winter hibernation; but I'll have to do that tomorrow so as I can get ready for The Reasoning concert - should there be two 'the's there. I need to get there early to suss out parking and get next month's ticket for Pendragon.

 

Everon's North arrived today so that'll be my trucking music this evening.

 

I've been on 'holiday' Angelo...don't worry, its coming to an end, so you'll be able to have your site back soon...

 

Now, admittedly that does not sound much of an achievement, but I can assure you it was.

 

Also from the beginning, I have to put my hand-up and admit it was my fault, as I was driving Debs's car and neglected to switch off the lights before nipping into the supermarket for 30 minutes, though technically I blame Honda, since my Hyundai does not suffer this design fault so when you turn off the ignition, the frickin lights turn off too, and also the battery on the Jazz is so unbelievably small it could probably be replaced by a hamster-wheel connected to a dynamo and suitable a small furry rodent on an exercise kick.

 

Anyhoo - recriminations aside, we found ourselves parked in Sainsbury's carpark with a flat battery and instantly our thoughts went back to the last time this happened about 18 years ago, all be it in a somewhat heavier car and somewhere in the Shropshire countryside miles away from civilisation, (but we were younger and fitter then), and I should also add that (again, my fault) I just assumed everyone knew how to bump-start a car... After pushing the car several hundred yards, repeatedly shouting "Now!" to no avail - it dawned on me that something wasn't quite right. Running alongside the free-wheeling vehicle I explained that when I shout "Now!", you drop the clutch. I got a quizzical look in response. "...Let the clutch out" I explained. The reply came back as a Nod. I walk back to the rear of the car that has by now trundled to a halt and gave it another push and once it was up to speed, a shout of "Now!"... nothing. "Put the fing thing in gear!" I scream and then Splat! as I crumple against the back of the car as it judders to a halt.

 

So I (relatively) calmly walk up to the driver's window and explain the rules: car in gear; clutch in; I push; shout Now! you drop the clutch and then I walk back to the rear of the car and start pushing again. Once we're up to speed I shouts "Now!"... and Splat! as I crumple against the tail-gate again as the car judders to a halt. Picking myself up and walking back to the driver's window, I run through it again: in gear; clutch in; I push; shout Now! you drop the clutch and give it some king revs! I stagger back, push car, up to speed, shout Now! and embed my face in the rear window as the car judders to a halt again...

 

By now we are running out of road and a life spent on chips, beer and cigarettes is starting to tell. "You do have the ignition on don't you?" I ask between gasps, Yes, she replies, giving me *that* look. Yeah, right I mutter under my breath as I crawl back to the rear of the car for one more try: push car, shout "Now!" - the finally car starts and lurches forward at speed as I fall face down onto the tarmac. Picking myself up I see the car parked several hundred yards down the road.

 

Does it reverse back to collect me? Does it buggery.

 

Anyway, that was 18 years ago in the middle of the Shropshire countryside. This is now, in the middle of Sainsbury's carpark in Farnham and the thought goes through my mind You get out and push the bloody thing!, but I do not say it, I just get out and start pushing, to be joined by a very helpful supermarket employee who was collecting stray trolleys, except that even with both of us pushing the car does not move... "You in gear?" I ask - a nod - "Then put you ruddy foot on the clutch pedal and press down!" - the lad giggles, and off we go, pushing for all our worth "Now!" I shout and we both crumple against the rear-hatch of the Jazz as the car judders to a halt. "Switch the sodding ignition ON!" I shout - the lad giggles again - "When?" comes the reply... I count to 10 ... "Now would be good"...

 

So, I'd like to offer my thanks to the employee of Sainsbury's supermarket for his help - I'll never say another rude thing about them skiving-off to collect stray trolleys when they should be operating the tills ever again. 

 

my supervisor has a Jazz, he  thinks they walk on water, my Vauxhall Carlton will be 20 years old next year and is still going strong and has still only 110,000 on the clock, average mileage for a car half its age. Will modern cars still be around in 20 years - i rarely see any cars older than 12 years on the road.

 

The sale of new cars (and everything else really) has seen a big downfall in the last 12 months, will we return to the unpretentious days of the old banger...?

 

 

 

never mind all that, Mr fancy-pants Admin...

 

there's still nothing quite like being able to go up to the counter in person, to buy a ticket form a real human being (just like visiting a real 2nd hand record shop, as opposed to ebay)...

 

at the Robin2 in Bilston, the venue specialises in putting on Rock/Folk/Blues gigs for our generation, and you can buy tickets from their own little bar next door...all being well, I shall go and see Karnataka on Tuesday night, and pick up my Reasoning and Pendies tickets at the same time...as well as enjoying a swift half...

 

well, I will be driving...