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Ricochet
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: February 27 2005
Location: Nauru
Status: Offline
Points: 46301
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 00:45 |
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Ricochet
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: February 27 2005
Location: Nauru
Status: Offline
Points: 46301
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 00:46 |
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Ricochet
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: February 27 2005
Location: Nauru
Status: Offline
Points: 46301
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 00:48 |
Ok,so for me:
- Snow Dog
- Cyggie-poo
- MWH
- Stonebeard
- King Of Loss
- The Miracle
- BJ-1
and others...
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Velvetclown
Forum Senior Member
Joined: February 13 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 8548
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 02:24 |
A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu.
"I'm sorry sir, but I am blind and can't read the menu. Just bring me a dirty fork from a previous customer, I'll smell it and order from there."
A little confused, the owner walks over to the dirty dish pile and picks up a greasy fork. He returns to the blind man's table and hands it to him. The blind man puts the fork to his nose and takes in a deep breath. "Ah, yes that's what I'll have, meatloaf and mashed potatoes."
Unbelievable, the owner says to himself as he walks towards the kitchen. The cook happens to be the owner's wife and he tells her what had just happened. The blind man eats his meal and leaves.
Several days later the blind man returns and the owner mistakingly brings him a menu again. "Sir, remember me? I'm the blind man."
"I'm sorry, I didn't recognize you. I'll go get you a dirty fork."
The owner again retrieves a dirty fork and brings it to the blind man. After another deep breath, the blind man says, "That smells great, I'll take the Macaroni and cheese with broccoli."
Once again walking away in disbelief, the owner thinks the blind man is screwing around with him and tells his wife that the next time the blind man comes in he's going to test him. The blind man eats and leaves.
He returns the following week, but this time the owner see's him coming and runs to the kitchen. He tells his wife, "Mary, rub this fork on your panties before I take it to the blind man." Mary complies and hands her husband the fork back.
As the blind man walks in and sits down, the owner is ready and waiting. "Good afternoon sir, this time I remembered you and I already have the fork ready for you."
The blind man puts the fork to his nose, takes a deep whiff and says, "Hey! I didn't know that Mary worked here!"
Edited by Velvetclown
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Ricochet
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: February 27 2005
Location: Nauru
Status: Offline
Points: 46301
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 02:35 |
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NutterAlert
Forum Senior Member
Joined: June 07 2005
Location: In transition
Status: Offline
Points: 2808
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 06:27 |
- VelvetClown
- Also loved the saturation-spamming by MWH/Stonie/Cyggie - hilarious
- TheDoctor
- Syzygy who has posted some cracking one-liners
- The review with an alien abduction in it, forgot the author, but an epic.
Also the countless posts that raise a titter posted by many on this forum and help brighten up the day.
Edited by NutterAlert
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Proud to be an un-banned member since 2005
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PROGMAN
Forum Senior Member
VIP Member
Joined: February 03 2004
Location: Wales
Status: Offline
Points: 2664
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 08:33 |
VelvetClown is the man for that and others too....
WELCOME TO PA AWARDS 2005 here is the first award:
Presented by Robert Fripp and Ian Anderson:
"For best comic post on ProgArchives, the winner is....VELVETCLOWN"
Presented by Bill Bruford and Steve Hackett:
"For the record breaking and longest running thread goes to...well VELVETCLOWN for Mariah Carey with over 1000 posts".
um..the end of the awards
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CYMRU AM BYTH
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Velvetclown
Forum Senior Member
Joined: February 13 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 8548
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 08:38 |
IŽd like to thank God and my mother and my sister and my cat and my ................
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Velvetclown
Forum Senior Member
Joined: February 13 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 8548
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 08:40 |
and my dentist and my boss and his wife and Tony R and Progman and all
the people of the UK and Cardiff and .....................the whole
planet and..............the universe and ............
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PROGMAN
Forum Senior Member
VIP Member
Joined: February 03 2004
Location: Wales
Status: Offline
Points: 2664
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 09:00 |
Smashing you deserve it.
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CYMRU AM BYTH
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Snow Dog
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: March 23 2005
Location: Caerdydd
Status: Offline
Points: 32995
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 09:03 |
Its a fix!!!!!!
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PROGMAN
Forum Senior Member
VIP Member
Joined: February 03 2004
Location: Wales
Status: Offline
Points: 2664
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 09:04 |
Snow Dog wrote:
Its a fix!!!!!! |
How???
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CYMRU AM BYTH
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sularetal
Forum Senior Member
Joined: November 24 2005
Location: Greece
Status: Offline
Points: 264
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 09:05 |
I don't laugh much lately. I don't know whats the matter with me......
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PROGMAN
Forum Senior Member
VIP Member
Joined: February 03 2004
Location: Wales
Status: Offline
Points: 2664
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 09:08 |
Next award:
Presented by VELVETCLOWN and Billy Conolly:
"For the most pointless threads of 2005, the winner is james hetfield"
Presented by James LaBrie and Ronnie Briggs:
"For the most conterversial newsline in the PA world in 2005 goes to, Tony R for the thread killings of Mariah Carey and Elvis Presely threads etc etc, and for Progtologist and PROGMAN for covering the stories and exposing the truth in their PA Newspapers".
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CYMRU AM BYTH
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NutterAlert
Forum Senior Member
Joined: June 07 2005
Location: In transition
Status: Offline
Points: 2808
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 09:57 |
Its seems we have found something we can all finally agree on. VelvetClown is an all round good egg.
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Proud to be an un-banned member since 2005
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Ricochet
Special Collaborator
Honorary Collaborator
Joined: February 27 2005
Location: Nauru
Status: Offline
Points: 46301
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 10:14 |
...hmm...wonder what cathegory I will win...
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PROGMAN
Forum Senior Member
VIP Member
Joined: February 03 2004
Location: Wales
Status: Offline
Points: 2664
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 10:31 |
Ok I'll have to make something up for you RICOCHET.
Presented by Klaus Schulze and Christopher Franke:
"Um...this is unscripted (cough), (gulp) I,I,I am h,h,hounered to present Ricochet with this award for um....um... (Chris help me here), (Cough), (Audience) boooo, Yes um the award is for outstanding acheivement in recognising in my Music and making me for what I am in PA, and for having my pics in his signiture< congratulations RICOCHET"
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CYMRU AM BYTH
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Velvetclown
Forum Senior Member
Joined: February 13 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 8548
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 10:32 |
Progman wins and Nutter as well, all British people win the VELVET HUG
It stinks I know
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PROGMAN
Forum Senior Member
VIP Member
Joined: February 03 2004
Location: Wales
Status: Offline
Points: 2664
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 10:32 |
^^ what that's it that's the award Klaus getting into PA
Edited by PROGMAN
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CYMRU AM BYTH
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Velvetclown
Forum Senior Member
Joined: February 13 2004
Status: Offline
Points: 8548
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Posted: December 14 2005 at 10:33 |
Yes
That and 21 virgins
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