The Ranting Room

mystic fred wrote: Blacksword wrote: Well on my ranting radar of late is 'HR Speak' Let me clarify: 'Human Resources speak' Now, every company has a HR (or personel) dept, but where I work they have so much clout it's unbelievable. Business trends come and go, and at present the trend is for touchy feely training courses, spin and double speak. The latest course was called 'Frameworks - For Leaders' I attended this two day session in a country hotel and was subjected to having to bare my soul to people I hardly knew, draw pictures that represented me as a child, a teenager and an adult, and partake in what we call intuition walks. These entail walking around the grounds of the hotel - in silence - with a note pad recording your feelings. After the walks we assemble in a circle, and have a 'Check In' This is where we each, in turn sum up our feelings in no more than three words at a time. When the session ends, one of the 'facilitators' sticks on an Enya CD to chill us out. These 'facilitators' are of course external consultants and earn more money than most of us will see in a lifetime. .   if you think that's bad you should go on one of those health and safety or introduction to counselling courses!! sometimes "politiofficespeak" or "HR speak" can work for you - i am on the security team where i work and also i am health & safety officer for the union. it's amazing sometimes! if there is a fire alarm i find myself in total control of the whole site, if i want anybody to do what i ask them to do (always in the interests of their safety) a multitude of sins can be covered by "well it's health and safety..."  - no argument with that !  try it!

I work in a formulation unit for a crop protection company, so there's plenty of health and safety protocal to follow, and I'm happy to accept that. We handle some pretty dangerous stuff, albeit in very small quantities.

The kind of HR speak I object to is purely business focussed. You there i go already!    In a scientific community, folk have very little time for ambiguous bullsh!t. The purpose of the courses was to install a new way of thinking among managers and leaders like myself, to promote positive thinking against a backdrop of some very negative changes. Turd pollishing basically. It's depressing...

Geck0 wrote: I presume you dislike "team building" exercises as well then?Do they still do the lifting boxes by bending your knees training, or is that an urban myth?

Yeah, we still train people in 'ergonomics' and that has some value. It's the philisophical, touchy feely rubbish I object to, designed to 'streamline''enhance integration' and improve 'synergy'


     

Stonebeard wrote: I hate how some people are bent on keeing their hearts cold to the joyous music that only a band such as Pallas can provide

That bloody well reminds me:

"The Sentinel"...

How did a bunch of Scottish 4th division Yes wannabees ever persuade Eddie Offord to produce such a rancid collection of (for the want of a better word) songs whose only benefit to the oevre of progressive rock is to act as a benchmark for other bands travelling the same road, who can listen to their own efforts and say "well hey, it may be crap, maybe we can't play very well, maybe the lyrics are appalling (can you say "Magenta"?) and maybe our drummer does sound like my granny playing biscuit tins with crochet hooks... whilst asleep... but at least we're not as bad as PALLAS"

+++sound of re-breathing exercises+++

spacecraft wrote: Mobile phones...why?

Mobile phones aren't my bugbear (usually...), but I'll tell you what I do hate about the bloody things:

Bluetooth Headsets!

OK, OK, they are fine and dandy as a handsfree kit whilst driving... but why do their sad b*****d owners insist on wearing/using them whilst walking down the street with normal people like us? Do they think other peoples' perception of their evidently talking to themselves i proves their image? Do they want to be seen as sad little Borg wannabees with their little plastic attachments sticking out of their bloody ears????

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

b*****dS!

Oh, by the way, welcome to the forum, spacecraft - we're not always like this....

....unless someone asks me about Pallas, that is...

Peter Doherty and his bands that create so called music!

It's out of tune, unintelligible muzak that contains far too many yeah yeah yeahs!

I cannot see how Babyshambles and The Libertines, are where they are...

Simply awful!


Edited by Geck0 - May 14 2006 at 00:50

Geck0 wrote: Chavs - need I say more?

...and they smell of wee.

Geck0 wrote: Peter Doherty and his bands that create so called music!

Jeez Geck0, you know how to push the wrong buttons, for me...

Pete Docherty?

Pete Docherty?

OHMYGODDON'TGETMESTARTEDONTHATTWAT!

Take two schoolfriends, one of whom plays guitar fairly well, and the other fancies himself as a singer (despite all evidence to the contrary), add an industry A&R man who thinks he can hype them to the heights, so long as they agree to have two session men (who can't stand them, anyway) foisted on them to turn them from a duo into a "band" & voila, The Libertines! Said "singer" now has an even more over-inflated sense of his own importance / talent, but now also has a gullible public throwing money at him, which fuels his new found taste for all things Columbian. Over inflated sense of self importance is now fueled by the paranoia inherent in South American marching powder...

...and the kids love him!

Jim Garten wrote: Geck0 wrote: Peter Doherty and his bands that create so called music! Jeez Geck0, you know how to push the wrong buttons, for me... Pete Docherty? Pete Docherty? OHMYGODDON'TGETMESTARTEDONTHATTWAT! Take two schoolfriends, one of whom plays guitar fairly well, and the other fancies himself as a singer (despite all evidence to the contrary), add an industry A&R man who thinks he can hype them to the heights, so long as they agree to have two session men (who can't stand them, anyway) foisted on them to turn them from a duo into a "band" & voila, The Libertines! Said "singer" now has an even more over-inflated sense of his own importance / talent, but now also has a gullible public throwing money at him, which fuels his new found taste for all things Columbian. Over inflated sense of self importance is now fueled by the paranoia inherent in South American marching powder... ...and the kids love him!

(edit)

...got a bit of an inside hook on this one, as one of my closest friends is the mother of Carl (Libertines guitarist); this may seem to be a character assassination attempt, but all the above is in the public domain, as opposed to other stuff I know but choose not to write!
    

Jim Garten wrote: [quote=Stonebeard]That bloody well reminds me: "The Sentinel"... How did a bunch of Scottish 4th division Yes wannabees ever persuade Eddie Offord to produce such a rancid collection of (for the want of a better word) songs whose only benefit to the oevre of progressive rock is to act as a benchmark for other bands travelling the same road, who can listen to their own efforts and say "well hey, it may be crap, maybe we can't play very well, maybe the lyrics are appalling (can you say "Magenta"?) and maybe our drummer does sound like my granny playing biscuit tins with crochet hooks... whilst asleep... but at least we're not as bad as PALLAS" +++sound of re-breathing exercises+++ ....unless someone asks me about Pallas, that is...

Edited by mystic fred - May 15 2006 at 12:10

I'm sick of people who quote Monty Python and think they're being funny. This is not aimed at any previous people who post. I'm in a local comedy troupe and I guess people recognize me as such and think they'll impress me by how much Python they can recite. Python is very original, cutting edge humour... or at least it was THIRTY FIVE YEARS AGO. Yes, most of it stands the test of time but would you start a band and only copy The Beatles? (insert Oasis joke here) The same people usually suggest sketch ideas and I know that if they quoted Python before telling me the idea, it's 100% certain the idea will end with "then he pulls out a gun and shoots him." Then they get upset when I don't double over in laughter.

Uh, sorry but we make it a point of giving our sketches actual endings. Now f--- off before I turn into one of the knights that will kick you in the nuts.

    
    
    

Edited by darren - May 15 2006 at 15:40