How do you recognise a dumb Progger?
Printed From: Progarchives.com
Category: Topics not related to music
Forum Name: Just for Fun
Forum Description: Participate in trivia and knowledge games, share jokes, etc.
URL: http://www.progarchives.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=93651
Printed Date: December 12 2024 at 11:44
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Topic: How do you recognise a dumb Progger?
Posted By: Gerinski
Subject: How do you recognise a dumb Progger?
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 05:15
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Possibly will be moved to JFF but since that's in 'Topics not related to music' I try here first. - goes to a ‘new Pink Floyd’ concert wearing a Roger Waters T-shirt - meets Rick Wakeman and asks him to sign a copy of Union - goes to a Transatlantic The Whirlwind tour concert and just before the show starts buys one drink at the bar confident that it will last until the next break between songs - is invited to Neal Morse’s birthday party and buys him as present a Richard Dawkins T-shirt - is asked to move Terry Bozzio’s drum kit to a concert venue and he shows up with a mini-van |
Replies:
Posted By: CPicard
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 07:13
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...asks Ian Anderson why he doesn't play the flute anymore... ...asks Robert Fripp what his albums with Chris Cutler sound like... |
Posted By: HolyMoly
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 07:52
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- Thinks a Mellotron is a type of bong ------------- My other avatar is a Porsche It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased. -Kehlog Albran |
Posted By: Gerinski
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 07:55
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- Thinks 'Moog' is the sound that cows make - Sees an ELO album at the record store and buys it excitedly thinking that Emerson and Lake have formed a new band with Anglagard's drummer Mattias Olsson
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Posted By: rushfan4
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 08:46
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- Has camera and asks Robert Fripp to smile before snapping picture. - Has camera and asks Tony Banks to smile before snapping picture. - Is at Penguin Orchestra Cafe concert and yells "Free Bird". ------------- 
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Posted By: refugee
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 09:10
Have I missed something here? I thought Eeən was still playing the flute, like he did last year on Thick as a Brick 2.Oh, wait, maybe that’s why it’s a stupid question. ------------- He say nothing is quite what it seems; I say nothing is nothing (Peter Hammill) |
CPicard wrote:Posted By: Gerinski
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 09:33
| ... when asked if he likes Fish he answers 'only salmon and cod' |
Posted By: CPicard
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 13:40
My bad, I wanted to write "Jon Anderson"! Damn, the joke is lost! Anyway, another one: The dumb progger is listening to Henry Cow while checking the booklet and ends asking :"But which one is Henry???" |
Posted By: Gerinski
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 13:57
Never mind  I'l try to fix it... he meets Ian Anderson and asks him 'how is it going with your brother Jon?'
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Posted By: Gerinski
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 14:16
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Hears that there's a TV show with a bald celebrity called Dr. Phil and sends a letter asking him how did he get the drumming of Apocalypse in 9/8 |
Posted By: refugee
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 14:31
Yet you made the joke subtler, so it’s okay.  I’ve heard that Henry and Pink are old friends … Btw, two British friends of mine used to own a wine shop in London, and Ian Anderson was one of their regulars. They’ve also met Phil Collins, and believe it or not, they say that he’s a very nice chap. But please don’t ask him this question: Why don’t you play drums anymore? ------------- He say nothing is quite what it seems; I say nothing is nothing (Peter Hammill) |
Posted By: Smurph
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 15:05
WAIT ROBERT FRIPP HAS ALBUMS WITH CHRIS CUTLER???? ------------- http://pseudosentai.bandcamp.com/" rel="nofollow - http://pseudosentai.bandcamp.com/ wtf |
Posted By: CPicard
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 15:13
Er, is it a joke or what? |
Posted By: Smurph
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 15:16
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Haha. I wish I was in on the joke. But I didn't think they did anything together. ------------- http://pseudosentai.bandcamp.com/" rel="nofollow - http://pseudosentai.bandcamp.com/ wtf |
Posted By: CPicard
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 15:23
Indeed. It was a joke about a possible confusion between Fripp and Frith (trust me, I've heard and read that some people made this mistake!) |
Posted By: Smurph
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 15:27
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OOOOOOH I got ya. Damn. I was about to poo gold. ------------- http://pseudosentai.bandcamp.com/" rel="nofollow - http://pseudosentai.bandcamp.com/ wtf |
Posted By: refugee
Date Posted: May 22 2013 at 15:31
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And you could always congratulate Fred Frith on his excellent work with Van der Graaf Generator, Peter Gabriel and David Bowie.
------------- He say nothing is quite what it seems; I say nothing is nothing (Peter Hammill) |
Posted By: rushfan4
Date Posted: May 23 2013 at 14:04
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- wears pants on the ground which show off his Dark Side Of The Moon boxer shorts -------------
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Posted By: Chozal
Date Posted: May 23 2013 at 15:09
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Thinks Ian Anderson is called Jethro Tull. Thinks Phil Collins' voice really changed since Dancing With the Moonlit Knight ------------- https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Infinite-Progability-Drive/141225469388975" rel="nofollow - The Infinite Progability Drive , feeding you daily progressive/weird music for just a like <3 |
Posted By: Stool Man
Date Posted: May 23 2013 at 16:40
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Thinks Fish is still the singer in Marillion ------------- rotten hound of the burnie crew |
Posted By: CPicard
Date Posted: May 23 2013 at 19:16
But Chris Squire had never been a singer!  |
Posted By: Tapfret
Date Posted: May 23 2013 at 20:03
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1. Names his daughter Geddy 2. When trying to impress a French speaking girl on a date says, "Wirt Kreuhn Köhrmahn üdets Glaö zaïn" 3. Gets really high to celebrate Frank Zappa's birthday. 4. When screaming for an encore at a Genesis concert yells, "Shock the Monkey!" ------------- https://www.last.fm/user/Tapfret" rel="nofollow">  https://bandcamp.com/tapfret" rel="nofollow - Bandcamp |
Posted By: Atavachron
Date Posted: May 23 2013 at 20:10
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^ While discussing Pink Floyd at a party, he says on numerous occasions "Those guys were crazy". |
Posted By: irrelevant
Date Posted: May 23 2013 at 20:11
I lol'd ------------- https://gabebuller.bandcamp.com/" rel="nofollow - New album! http://www.progarchives.com/artist.asp?id=7385" rel="nofollow - http://www.progarchives.com/artist.asp?id=7385 |
Posted By: Gerinski
Date Posted: May 24 2013 at 04:10
| Thinks Post-Rock is a system for ordering albums via the mail service |
Posted By: Tapfret
Date Posted: May 24 2013 at 13:24
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Meets Steve Wilson, hopes to have copy of "Pet Sounds" autographed.
------------- https://www.last.fm/user/Tapfret" rel="nofollow"> https://bandcamp.com/tapfret" rel="nofollow - Bandcamp |
Posted By: Chozal
Date Posted: May 24 2013 at 14:08
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Says he prefer the cello version over the piano version of 4'33
------------- https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Infinite-Progability-Drive/141225469388975" rel="nofollow - The Infinite Progability Drive , feeding you daily progressive/weird music for just a like <3 |
Posted By: refugee
Date Posted: May 24 2013 at 14:46
I think the original (for audience and chairs) is a bit dull, so maybe the cello version is better. ------------- He say nothing is quite what it seems; I say nothing is nothing (Peter Hammill) |
Posted By: progbethyname
Date Posted: May 25 2013 at 00:21
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When someone thinks Ian salmon is fish's brother.
When someone thinks IQ is just a test for intelligence. When someone thinks RPI is intials you put on someones tombstone. When someone thinks genesis is a religious band. ------------- Gimmie my headphones now!!! 🎧🤣 |
Posted By: Tapfret
Date Posted: May 25 2013 at 16:26
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While agreeing with you that Xanadu is a great song, feels that you are way out of line to consider Olivia Newton John to be prog.
------------- https://www.last.fm/user/Tapfret" rel="nofollow"> https://bandcamp.com/tapfret" rel="nofollow - Bandcamp |
Posted By: Tapfret
Date Posted: May 25 2013 at 16:30
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1. Spells recognize with an 's'. 2. Points out a spelling mistake 3 days and 2 pages into the thread.  ------------- https://www.last.fm/user/Tapfret" rel="nofollow"> https://bandcamp.com/tapfret" rel="nofollow - Bandcamp |
Posted By: VOTOMS
Date Posted: May 25 2013 at 16:42
| Ask ELP to sign Love Beach. |
Posted By: Horizons
Date Posted: May 25 2013 at 18:29
Likes Hogarth more than Fish (era) ------------- Crushed like a rose in the riverflow. |
Posted By: AtomicCrimsonRush
Date Posted: May 25 2013 at 18:48
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In an interview with Pink Floyd, states "by the way, which one's Pink?" (actually occurred many times in the early days!) Listens to Magma and says "this is great I have always loved the French language in prog" Think they know a lot about Genesis but have never heard of Peter Gabriel. Still think Jon Anderson fronts Yes. Listens to the Emerson side of "Works" and says "what is this classical crap? Why don't you put some decent music on such as ELP?" Hears "Plague of Lighthouse Keepers" and thinks its a great song about the profession of maintaining a lighthouse. Wonders why Genesis did not release better albums that were as awesome as "ABACAB" or "Invisible Touch". Thinks that the latest movie "Rush" is a sequel to "Beyond the Lighted Stage" Thinks Yes were a one hit wonder with "Owner of a Lonely Heart" Thinks Procol Harum only released one decent song with "Whiter Shade of Pale" ------------- 
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Posted By: progbethyname
Date Posted: May 25 2013 at 23:53
Yeeeeesss!! Right on.  ------------- Gimmie my headphones now!!! 🎧🤣 |
Posted By: progbethyname
Date Posted: May 25 2013 at 23:55
Oh Scott. These are great. I knew you would kick ass at this thread. ------------- Gimmie my headphones now!!! 🎧🤣 |
Posted By: progbethyname
Date Posted: May 25 2013 at 23:59
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When somebody thinks.......
Nightwish is a satist cult. Judas Priest is Progressive Metal Meshuggha is a type of sugar. ------------- Gimmie my headphones now!!! 🎧🤣 |
Posted By: Gerinski
Date Posted: May 26 2013 at 04:06
I believe that 'ise' is perfectly accepted (and even preferred) on this side of the pond
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Posted By: Gerinski
Date Posted: May 26 2013 at 04:11
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spells 'Melontron' never listened to King Crimson because he is republican
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Posted By: Snow Dog
Date Posted: May 26 2013 at 04:13
Agreed. The z users are the morons. ------------- http://www.last.fm/user/Snow_Dog" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Stool Man
Date Posted: May 26 2013 at 04:14
'recognise' gets 50.9 million hits on Google.com ------------- rotten hound of the burnie crew |
Posted By: Tapfret
Date Posted: May 26 2013 at 18:26
The z just looks like an s when you Brits are driving on the wrong  ing side of the road.------------- https://www.last.fm/user/Tapfret" rel="nofollow"> https://bandcamp.com/tapfret" rel="nofollow - Bandcamp |
Posted By: JJLehto
Date Posted: May 26 2013 at 18:42
In reference to the title  |
Posted By: progbethyname
Date Posted: May 26 2013 at 23:44
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9/10 genius's are Terrible spellers. Apparently, Albert Einstein couldn't spell for sh*t. Anyway, it's something I don't nit-pick about, but I guess if I were part of the errors and omissions team I'd be all over that sh*t, but in a nice way of course.
------------- Gimmie my headphones now!!! 🎧🤣 |
Posted By: Snow Dog
Date Posted: May 27 2013 at 03:53
Sorry...I meant the z users are Americans. NOT morons. Definitely NOT morons. Americans. ------------- http://www.last.fm/user/Snow_Dog" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: Morsenator
Date Posted: May 27 2013 at 04:50
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Thinks Mike Oldfield is a horror movie soundtrack composer Starts to listen to any experimental album, stops after ten seconds and tries to fix his CD player Thinks that any album ending 30-minute epic must be really a 15 minute song with a hidden track ------------- You love the music, the music loves you! http://moonsofjupiter.bandcamp.com/" rel="nofollow - http://moonsofjupiter.bandcamp.com/ |
Posted By: Gerinski
Date Posted: May 29 2013 at 15:53
| ... thinks Richard Hammond and James May must be prog musicians (apologies to non-British people who may not know who they are). |
Posted By: HemispheresOfXanadu
Date Posted: May 31 2013 at 13:50
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^Everyone knows the Top Gear guys.  Thinks Slash used that riff first. Thinks [insert any prog band name here] is underrated because they don't have a large following.* Regularly listens to The Wall on shuffle. *My all time biggest prog pet peeve.
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Posted By: Gerinski
Date Posted: May 31 2013 at 15:03
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when asked if he likes Pink Floyd he gets a big smile on his face and starts air-singing 'We don't need no... education...' thinks that Syd Barrett is the singer of Pendragon. thinks that Roger Dean was that rebel without a cause who got killed on his Porsche.
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Posted By: Tapfret
Date Posted: May 31 2013 at 18:34
That's nice because... Thinks people just hate on [insert any prog band name here] and believe they are superior because they have a large following.* .... *My all time biggest prog pet peeve. ------------- https://www.last.fm/user/Tapfret" rel="nofollow"> https://bandcamp.com/tapfret" rel="nofollow - Bandcamp |
Posted By: CPicard
Date Posted: May 31 2013 at 19:54
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The dumb progger thinks that the "9/8" in "Apocalypse in 9/8" refers to a location (latitude and longitude). |
Posted By: smartpatrol
Date Posted: May 31 2013 at 20:07
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Someone who's dumb and likes Prog
------------- http://bit.ly/1kqTR8y" rel="nofollow">  The greatest record label of all time! |
Posted By: silverpot
Date Posted: June 01 2013 at 08:59
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