Bad Taste Humour

The ManRules 
Atlast a guy has taken the time to write this alldown

  Finally , theguys' side of the story. 
( I must admit, it's pretty good.) 
We always hear " therules" 
Fromthe female side....

  Nowhere are the rules from the maleside.    

Theseare our rules! 
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " 
ON PURPOSE!  

1.  Men are NOT mind readers. 
( FIRST& FOREMOST RULE)

1.Learn to work the toilet seat. 
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. 
We need it up, you need it down. 
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 

1. Sunday sports or news, It's like the full moon 
or the changing of the tides. 
Let it be. 

1.. Crying is blackmail. 

1. Ask for what you want. 
Let us be clear on this one: 
Subtle hints do not work! 
Strong hints do not work! 
Obvious hints do not work! 
Just say it! 

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost everyquestion. 

1. Come to us with a problem only ifyou want help solving it. That's what we do. 
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in anargument. 
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days. 


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. 
Don't ask us. 

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of theways makes you sad or angry, we meantthe   otherone 

1. You can either ask us to do something 
Or tell us how you want it done. 
Not both. 
If you already know best how to do it , just do ityourself. 

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.. 

1. Captain Cook did NOT needdirections and neither do we. 

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows defaultsettings. 
Peach, for example, is a fruit,not A color.Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no ideawhat mauve is. 

1. Ifit itches, it will bescratched. 
We do that. 

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong. 
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth thehassle.. 

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect ananswer you don't want to hear. 

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear isfine... Really . 

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are preparedto discuss such topics as Football 
or Cars. 

1. You have enough clothes. 

1. You have too many shoes. 

1. I am in shape.   Round ISa shape! 

1. Thank you for reading this. 
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; 


Butdid you know men really don't mind that? It's likecamping.