Your Call Is Important To Us

Please don't hang up because YOUR CALL IS IMPORTANT TO US - so important that we've installed this automated answering service which prevents you from speaking to a live human being, unless you can select the right combination of 81 in-call options, which will take you through to our customer service centre in Calcutta - if you're lucky - or the one just outside Glasgow if you guess incorrectly. You will subsequently be quizzed by a disinterested, otherwise unemployable customer services representative, reading from a script on their PC screen so, to be honest, you might as well accept that, one way or another, YOUR CALL WHICH IS VERY IMPORTANT TO US, will be dealt with by a computer in an almost certainly unsatisfactory manner. If you would like to hear some urban music now, press 1, to listen to pop, press 2, if classical is more your thing, press 3. Thank you for holding....