Bad Translator

Original text:

"Would you believe me if I told you I feel like crap?"

...56 translations later we get:

"I understand f*****e money?"

Original text:

"Always remember that whenever someone says that they hate you, they are giving you permission to rip their head off."

...56 translations later we get:

"Hate the name to read comments."

Original text:

"Why won't the non-German girl write me? I thought she respected me as a person."

...56 translations later we get:

"Young German company go"

Original text:

"I need a new wombat because I just killed my last one."

...56 translations later we get:

"Faskolom previous relationship."

Original text:

"Cats and donkeys are sweet. "

...30 translations later we get:

"Sweet ass cat."

Original text:

"The conversation was about the particle accelerator. Edgar had planned to put it in the living room, next to the sofa, while Edna was convinced that the garage would be a more appropriate place for it."

...56 translations later we get:

"To edgar Sabbath in a chair, if the vehicle speed where to be seen."

Original text:

"It was a perfectly ordinary day at the track, except that there was an oiled vagina involved and the horses rose up against the jockeys and whipped them."

...56 translations later we get:

"This is a special day on the road. But the market is a joke about geureulreul."

Original text:

"Shake hands with beef"

...56 translations later we get:

"Huge Success"